Since most of the wedding planning action is on the bride’s side, the mother of the groom might be left wondering what her role is on the big day. Even if tradition dictates that she has limited involvement in planning the wedding, both mothers play a significant role in making the wedding happen.

So, if you’re looking to help at your son’s wedding, here are some mother of the groom duties that you can do:

Before the Wedding

Offer Financial Help

Sit down with your son and future daughter-in-law to discuss the support that they need financially, and let them know how much you can share. Some of the vendors or items that you can cover are:

• Wedding rings
• Wedding officiant
• Groom’s suit
• Transportation
• Flowers (bridal bouquet, boutonnieres, corsages)
• Band
• Wedding venue
• Alcohol
• The newlyweds’ honeymoon

Be a Point of Contact

If the wedding is happening in your hometown, and the couple is living somewhere else, be the main point of contact with the vendors. Doing this can significantly help them, especially when a personal appearance is needed, such as a site visit, food tasting (if the couple is not available), or even just to drop off a check payment.

Host the Rehearsal Dinner

Plan and host the rehearsal dinner. With the reception often paid for by the couple themselves or the bride’s parents, you can offer to take care of the engagement party and/or rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding ceremony.

Attend the Bridal Shower

This is a great chance to get to know the bride’s friends, family, and other wedding party members. It’s also a nice gesture of support to your soon-to-be daughter-in-law. The bridal shower is also a great time to speak with the bride’s parents and get to know them a little bit better.

Check-in on Your Family

From collecting friends and relatives’ names and addresses to assisting the bride and groom with the RSVPs, helping with the wedding guest list can take an all-important, yet stressful, task off the happy couple’s shoulders.

Keep the Family Traditions Alive

If anything has been done during milestones in the family over the years, feel free to share it with the soon-to-be-married couple. Maybe there’s a beautiful poem or blessing that can be read during the wedding ceremony or an heirloom that the bride can hold or wear. These are things that can be shared with the wedding couple, although ultimately, it’s their decision whether to include the tradition(s) or not.

Help the Father of the Groom With His Speech

Fathers are often tasked to give a toast at the reception and to thank the guests for coming to the wedding. You can help your husband keep his speech short and sweet, and, if your son asks you to, you can also say a few words of your own.

Assist With the DIYs

Do-it-yourself décor accents or favors are a lot of work, and they can use another set of hands, especially if you’re crafty.

Inform Guests of the Couple’s Registry

Though the couple’s wedding registry is written on the invitation, guests would still often ask about it. Be sure you have their Zola wedding registry link on your phone, so it’s easier for you to share this information with your friends and relatives.

During the Wedding

Photo Credit // Robert Faust Photography

On the day of the wedding, make sure that you’re available to lend a helping hand to the bride and groom. Some other ways that you can help may include:

Round-Up the Family

Since you know everyone on the groom’s side of the family, assist in gathering everyone for photos, seat them for the ceremony, and ensure that everyone has a ride going to the reception.

Mother and Son Dance

Like the bride’s father and daughter dance, you are also going to dance with your son. Have a quick practice with him when he has the time. Choose a meaningful song that you’ll both remember for the rest of your lives.

Enjoy the Party

Remember, this is a day for you to celebrate, too. Mingle with the guests and your in-laws, and show your son that you’re having a great time. It will mean a lot to him and his now-wife.

As the mother of the groom, you can always offer help with the wedding planning process. On the wedding day, be there to support your son in any way that you can. The best thing that you can do is to help bridge your families, welcome wedding guests, and soak in all the special moments of this defining day.