Wedding Party Etiquette Guide for a Second Marriage

Don’t know how to plan a wedding shower for a second marriage? The experts at Zola can help! Read on now.

By Janina Villanueva

Wedding Party Etiquette Guide for a Second Wedding
Photo by Studio Opia

Nowadays, many marriages involve someone who has been married before, and keeping the second wedding quiet is no longer the norm. Second marriages are a cause for celebration as much as the first, and people are now more accepting and hopeful for a lasting relationship than in the past.

Having experienced a wedding firsthand, second-timers are often more mature and comfortable with their likes and dislikes. Most of them also don’t consider this their second or third wedding, but rather their first, to each other. Couples who are getting married the second time are often paying for the wedding themselves, so it can be as intimate or as elaborate as they wish.

With or without the bells and whistles, it all comes down to what this event means to them and their families. All bets are off when it comes to the number of wedding guests, the venue, the bride’s gown, and more. Ultimately, it’s up to the second-time bride and groom to decide how they want to spend their special day.

Planning a Wedding Shower for a Second Marriage | Zola Photo Credit // Nicki Metcalf Photography

Still, there may be several predicaments and questions specific to remarriages, and one of the most often asked questions is: Can I have a wedding party for my second wedding?

Having a bridal party is not completely necessary—as in any wedding, what you primarily need are witnesses, and it can be any two adults that you choose,such as a best man and a maid of honor. But, even if some second-timers tend to keep the number of attendants small, there is no reason why you shouldn’t have to be surrounded by your closest friends, children, or even your parents at your wedding. Still don’t know if a wedding party for a second marriage is right for you? If it’s your or your partner’s second time getting married, and you would like more people involved, here are some people whom you may want to include in your wedding party:

Parents

Most remarrying brides choose to walk down the aisle alone, but, if you prefer, you can still request that your parents walk by your side down the aisle. Similarly, the groom can also choose to have his parents waiting with him or walking with him down the aisle. Parents can even say a few words at the rehearsal dinner, if requested by the bride and groom.

Children

Do you or your partner have children? If you do, do you want to involve them in the wedding ceremony? There are many roles that can be assigned to your kids, from being a ring bearer or a flower girl, to reading at the ceremony and/or assisting you in the lighting of the unity candle. Older children can serve as your maid of honor or best man, or escort the bride down the aisle.

It’s always best to talk to the children first, before even beginning to plan the wedding. One of the considerations you should take in a second wedding is being sensitive to the kids in the previous marriage. Are they comfortable being in a large wedding setting? Ask them about how they feel about taking part in your wedding celebration for your second marriage. Giving them a part may make them feel included in your journey and newfound love, but also don’t force them to participate if they’re not willing to take part in your wedding ceremony. Some things may take time, including their acceptance, especially if their parents got divorced.

Closest Friends

Having friends who know you best beside you on your wedding day is one of the most incredible things that your friendship can experience. So, yes, if you want to, have some bridesmaids and groomsmen at your second wedding ceremony and wedding reception. As these are people who are closest to you, they can be the same groomsmen or bridesmaid groups you chose from your previous wedding party, and that’s okay, as long as they agree.

Planning a Wedding Shower for a Second Marriage | Zola Photo Credit // Zola

There are no changes in the wedding party’s duties and roles, as they are still your support system, and they can both host a second marriage wedding shower and attend pre-wedding activities. They’re also responsible for their outfits, unless you are able to cover this for them.

Your second wedding can be anything that you want, and having a wedding party is all about honoring the ones who are close to you, and who are supportive of your relationship as a couple. Continuously look for ways to incorporate family and friends throughout the entire wedding—both in the ceremony and at the wedding reception.

When it comes to having a wedding party, whether you decide to have many people, just one important person, or no one at all, these people will still be present to celebrate your love and happiness on your wedding day. To get started with your wedding planning, create a wedding website at Zola today.

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