No matter how long you’ve been dreaming about your wedding day, when it finally comes time to start planning, the task can feel a little overwhelming. From venues to vendors, and attire to decor, there are so many choices that add up and can cause even the most level-headed bride or groom to feel stressed.
Luckily, you don’t have to become an expert on all things weddings to throw a beautiful celebration. In fact, we advise finding a wedding planning community to help you avoid the stress and isolation that comes with planning a huge event on your own. By leaning into your support group both emotionally and practically, you’ll be surprised to discover just how much easier—and more fun—planning your day can be.
No matter what you might have seen in movies, or how the tasks were delegated long ago, nowadays, wedding planning isn’t a one-person job. Considering how intricate and large-scale events have become, splitting up wedding planning duties is not only advised, but it’s essential. In fact, according to Zola’s First Look Report, the majority of 2022 couples are splitting up wedding tasks amongst each other and with other people too.
Here’s who you can consider including in the planning process, plus the type of tasks that you can consider delegating to them:
First and foremost, it’s a good idea to split wedding planning tasks with your significant other. Setting the stage for the dual effort that you’re putting into your future by planning together is a fantastic foot to start out on. That being said, not everyone is as organized or into planning as the other.
If that’s the case, sit down and chat about what areas you’re each most interested in. Maybe music, transportation, and the hotel block are important to your future spouse, while you care more about decor and your photographer. Once you each know what areas you’d like to focus on, split up the remaining duties between yourselves and the rest of your “planning team.” Then, schedule some check-in times on the calendar to ensure that things get accomplished at an appropriate rate.
Your wedding party isn’t just there to look pretty at the wedding and have fun at the bachelorette party—they’re there to help too. From scheduling fittings, coordinating bridesmaid dresses and/or groomsman suits, and helping with invitation creation and sendoffs, there are plenty of ways to utilize your wedding party beyond just having them walk down the aisle and fill the dance floor at the reception.
Does your dad love to negotiate contracts? Does your mom have amazing handwriting, plus knowledge of all of your relatives’ addresses? Is your bestie super organized, while your cousin is a decorating wiz? Lean into your friends and families’ strong suits and delegate tasks that they’ll be excited to take on. Not only does this help them feel included and take something off your plate, but you’d be surprised just how willing others are to help, especially when it’s doing something that they’re passionate about.
One of the best and most stress-free ways to take some of the planning burden off of yourself is to hire a wedding planner. If your budget allows, a planner is one of the best investments that you can make, not only for your wedding, but also for your mental health leading up to the big day. Since planning weddings is in the job title of an event planner, you can rest easy knowing that everything will get done and the day will unfold flawlessly.
Even though it helps to go into vendor meetings with an idea of what you want, when it comes down to some of the detailed planning or execution, remember that they’re the pros. Chances are that you’re balancing work, friendships, your personal life, and fostering your relationship at the same time as wedding planning, so delegate some of the work to the people getting paid to do it. Make it clear when hiring your vendors what you expect from them, and don’t be afraid to ask them for help with the planning process. If it’s not within their bandwidth or expertise, they can definitely point you toward someone who can help.
What makes the support of a community so important is that you’re not just counting on one person to pick up all those extra tasks or answer all those confusing questions—you have a whole team of people to turn to. Here are some people to consider including in your wedding planning community, and how to build a resource group that’s right for you.
Chances are that the people in your wedding party are your true VIPS—the friends and family who have stood by your side and are honored to be a part of your day. These are the folks who have likely seen your relationship unfold, so don’t be afraid to lean on them when the emotions get overwhelming or you’re feeling stuck.
Not only have they likely helped you through other stressful times, which means that they know what you need and how you respond in times of pressure, but odds are that there’s a person or two in your group who has planned (or is in the process of planning) their own wedding day. Seek their advice, support, and assistance wherever possible, and because they have your best interest at heart, delegate to the most organized person of the bunch (such as your maid of honor) to ensure that you receive the support that you need.
In addition to your wedding party, your friends and family know you dearly and are typically advocates for your absolute happiness. From collecting addresses and going with you to fittings, to pampering you with a homemade meal or a night of non-wedding talk, your friends and family are some of the best advocates to help you stay grounded during the wedding planning process.
From where to look for bridal gowns to which vendors have in-budget quotes, consider other engaged couples to be more eyes and ears on your planning team. Not only can they give you information about vendors that they’ve reached out to and/or are working with, but when it comes to the stress and sometimes frustration that goes along with planning a wedding, other engaged couples can commiserate because they're right there with you in the trenches.
After spending months or years planning your wedding day, you’re going to be left with a ton of knowledge. And so, while you’re planning, don’t be afraid to reach out to other couples who recently said: “I do.” They just spent a lot of time and money on their big day, and chances are that they’d be more than happy to lend some advice. In fact, this might turn out to be one of the best resources you have, especially if these couples live in your area, so even if you’re not close, reach out and you might be surprised at how much physical and emotional support you receive.
If you don’t have a lot of support in person or you’re just looking to expand your net, there are tons of online planning tools and communities that can help you stay on track, on budget, and as stress-free as possible leading to the big day.
Chances are that you’re already on your computer pinning inspiration and researching vendors, so join Zola’s Facebook community while you’re at it. The virtual community is the largest wedding-planning company page of its type, and it’s filled with all kinds of couples spanning all budgets, all celebration types, all ethnicities, and all sexual orientations and preferences. Consider this your go-to hub to not only seek comfort and advice from other couples, but also to offer your own support. Together, the sense of community can help anyone who feels isolated or overwhelmed while planning from anywhere in the world.
Similar to our Facebook community, Zola’s in-app community provides a space for all of our Zola couples to connect with Zola tools directly and seek assistance from Zola experts with just a click of a button. From decor inspiration, vendor suggestions, hashtag help, and information about how to use Zola, the app has it all. Whether you’re at home dreaming or out and about, actively searching for venues and vendors, the app is the perfect space to read reviews about vendors, find recommendations from real couples in your area, and get opinions from other couples IRL from the comfort of your phone.
Many wedding vendors and venues have their own communities, as do different wedding themes and geographic areas. Spend some time searching on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and TikTok for blogs, forums, and communities that are specific to your wedding day. Chances are that there’s a for-you specific community out there just waiting to welcome you and assist in your creative vision.
No matter where you find your community, knowing that wedding planning doesn’t just fall on you is essential. Lean on your vendors, ask your friends and loved ones for help, and remember to take some time to unwind and relax. Not only will it make planning easier, but you’ll build lasting relationships along the way.