What Is a Hopeless Romantic?

Do you know a hopeless romantic? Learn what it means to be a hopeless romantic, the typical characteristics and traits, and how they perceive love differently.

By Jane Chertoff and Georgie Darling

Pair of hands holding on a blue table with espresso martinis and a slice of cake.
Photo by Zola

A really good first date has you daydreaming about your wedding day. Your favorite type of movie is always a rom-com. And you’re a firm believer in love at first sight. Does all of this sound a little familiar? It could be that you’re a hopeless romantic.

While the internet may portray hopeless romantics negatively, we (as big lovers of romance ourselves) think there are definitely positives to seeing the world through rose-tinted glasses.

So, what is a hopeless romantic? Read on to learn the typical characteristics of a hopeless romantic, and our guidance on how to keep your relationship balanced and healthy.

What Is a Hopeless Romantic?

A hopeless romantic is someone who has unrealistically high expectations and ideals about romance. They’re often optimistic, passionate, and loyal. They tend to fall in love easily and deeply, and they’re not afraid to express their feelings. While there are benefits to being with a hopeless romantic, some partners may find them intense.

12 Signs of a Hopeless Romantic

These are some of the most common traits of a hopeless romantic.

1. Relationships are one-sided

Hopeless romantics often pour their heart and soul into their relationships. They tend to give more than they receive.

2. They have a vivid imagination and often fantasize about their ideal partner

They’ve probably planned their wedding day in great detail. Dress? They’ve got it drawn up. Venue? They're on the waiting list. Invitations? They’ve got the spreadsheet hidden away, ready for the big day.

3. They're willing to overlook negative words or actions

They’re very forgiving or tolerant of their partner’s imperfections. They focus on their positive qualities and potential above anything else.

4. They have a playlist of songs that remind them of love

And it might just be their most frequently played. No judgment here, you’ll find us occasionally belting out “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston when we’re home alone, too.

5. They believe in love at first sight…over and over again

They declare their feelings without hesitation. They love the thrill and the excitement of romance. When it doesn’t work out, they start planning the next one. They’re not romantically hopeless, they’re just optimistic.

6. They write love letters or poetry

Maybe they like to re-read the cute letters they’ve received from beaus in the past. Or they might even be something of a poet themself. Obviously, they’ll want to write their own vows for the wedding!

7. They have a strong belief in fate

A soulmate? Yup: they know theirs is waiting for them out there. They may trust their intuition or their feelings more than logic or reason when it comes to love.

8. They have a fairytale-like view of love

And they’re the main character, waiting for their happily-ever-after. Maybe they expect their partner to fall just as passionately and struggle to understand why they don’t feel quite as crazy-in-love.

9. They believe a romantic relationship will improve their life

They place a lot of importance on finding a partner and believe that being in a relationship will make them complete.

10. They lead with their emotions

It’s fair to say their head and their heart don’t always see eye-to-eye when it comes to their romantic relationships.

11. They struggle with long-term relationships

Sometimes they put their partner on a pedestal, which can make it a challenge to get past the early stages of relationships.

12. Above all, they love love

They’re always on the lookout for their soulmate. And they grasp the opportunity for new love with both hands.

How Being a Hopeless Romantic Can Affect Relationships

There are definitely benefits to being or dating a hopeless romantic. For starters, they’re endlessly caring and generous. But if those hopeless romantic tendencies become too intense, they can end up in a one-sided relationship with unrealistic expectations of their partner.

EAInline HopelessRomantic Photo: Unsplash

How to Become a Hopeful Romantic

If you’re a hopeless romantic and want to become a more hopeful romantic, follow these tips:

  • Be realistic with your expectations
  • Communicate and listen to your partner
  • Maintain your independence and identity
  • Be proactive and assertive in your relationship


Here are some frequently asked questions about hopeless romantics.

What Does Hopeless Romantic Mean?

“Hopeless romantic” means someone who sees their relationships through rose-tinted glasses. They believe in love at first sight, put their all into romantic gestures, and may have unrealistic expectations about their relationship. They become quickly invested in their partner and their future.

Is Being a Hopeless Romantic Good?

Being a hopeless romantic can have positive and negative effects on your relationship. On the plus side, being a hopeless romantic can make you more caring and generous. However, being a hopeless romantic can also make you more vulnerable, insecure, dependent, and unrealistic.

What Is an Example of a Hopeless Romantic?

An example of a hopeless romantic is Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City, who has an intense affair with Mr. Big, a charming businessman who's afraid of commitment. She dates other men but always comes back to Mr. Big. Carrie believes he's her true love and soulmate despite their ups and downs.

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