Alright lady lovebirds, now that it’s time to make it official, letting the wedding planning begin. If you’re seeking inspiration for your lesbian wedding, we have a list of creative ways to make the day extra special and wholly your own. From the venue choice to the wedding day attire, and the cake topper to the reception signage, our guide is designed to help you make your wedding dreams come true.
Zola has a wide variety of wedding invitation designs to suit your style of wedding. All of them include space to fill in your names or initials, rather than be restricted to a Mr. and Mrs. distinction. Brides love the Lyons Classic wedding invitation for its modern font that states, “We do” and the classic color options. It’s simplistic, yet chic, and perfect for any range of wedding formality or location.
There’s also the option of designing your own invitation. It leaves creative room for you to depict an illustration of two brides, or the opportunity to add an engagement photo of the two of you. Once you decide on a color scheme and style that you like, you can carry it through to your save the date cards and wedding website design, as well.
Every bride has their own idea of how they want the ceremony to unfold. Are you looking forward to the traditional walk down the aisle and exchanging vows in front of your friends and family? Or, do you prefer the idea of a quiet courthouse ceremony before celebrating with loved ones at a reception afterward? Either way, you may decide to have a newly ordained friend or non-denominational pastor lead or help guide your ceremony for inclusivity among everyone.
Additionally, neither of you may want to be “given away” as is the standard for a bride’s father to do, but rather you walk down the aisle together as a couple or accompanied by both sets of parents. When planning how you want your wedding ceremony to unfold, focus on the areas that are important to you as a couple, and feel free to set your own standard when it comes to saying “I do.”
The search for the perfect wedding dress is a dream for any bride. You may discover that it’s less about the dress and more about what you’ll wear when you commit yourself forever to the one that you love. With that being said, skip right over the fluffy, white dress if you find another outfit that speaks to your own style and personality. A three-piece suit, low-key sundress, or even dress shorts and a jacket are all stylish ways that brides are choosing to modernize their wedding wear.
Furthermore, you can skip wearing white altogether. While white is a beautifully classic option, choosing rich, jewel tones for your dress, suit, or shoes is a way to spice up your wedding attire and let each of your fashion choices shine through. The one factor to keep in mind is how each of your outfits will complement the others. If you’re straying from the standard black suit/white dress wedding style, choose a color palette that coordinates without having to be too matchy-matchy.
Whether you both decide to stick with tradition and choose a floor-length bridal gown or you opt for an unconventional look for your big day, wear whatever will make you feel the most comfortable and confident.
After the wedding dress decision, the wedding party is the next wardrobe to consider. Incorporate the same color scheme within your wedding party as you do for your own dress or outfit selections. One way to approach wedding attire is to allow each person in your wedding party to select what they want to wear (as long as it’s in the same spectrum of your wedding colors).
For example, if purple is your chosen hue, allow anyone who stands up with you to choose a dress or suit in complementary shades, such as lilac and plum. On the other hand, there’s nothing wrong with asking everyone to wear the same style and color when it comes to the wedding party’s wedding outfits. It all depends on the overall look you want for your wedding and how many people must coordinate together.
Traditionally speaking, the bride’s guests sit on the left, but it’s become common to allow guests to pick a seat on whichever side they’d like. Get cheeky with the seating arrangements at the ceremony by having a sign that reads “Pick a seat not a side; either way, it’s for the bride.” It sets the tone for a lesbian wedding in a lighthearted way and eliminates any confusion for guests who are unsure of which side to choose as they take a seat.
Speaking of signs, have your flower girl and/or ring bearer carry a sign that says “Here comes the brides.” Or, set up a guestbook for Mrs. and Mrs. for everyone to sign as they arrive. Adding these intentional touches helps to make your day feel authentically you and brings a smile to all as they get ready to witness your union.
Incorporate words from writers and artists that speak to you as a couple and focus on the value of partnership, love, and respect as individuals, without mention of gender. Or, reinterpret lyrics or verses to accommodate your love by leaving out the parts that don’t fit and keeping the ones that speak most to you.
As you consider songs and readings that hold important significance to you, think about how the words resonate with you and how you want your guests to reflect on them, as well. Two popular examples are E.E. Cummings’ poem “I Carry Your Heart with Me” and “The Art of Marriage” by Wilferd Arlan Peterson. However, there’s an endless list of options to choose from; the only problem is narrowing them down to only a few.
The cutting of the cake is one of the highlights of any wedding. The cake topper is a detail that seems small, but is yet another way for a couple to show their thoughtfulness and creativity. For a lesbian wedding, choose a woman couple as your cake topper. You can have it customized to resemble each of you, making it all the more fabulous.
Another idea is to top your cake with a rainbow, or surprise guests with a rainbow cake interior and keep the bridal white exterior. Or, consider lining each cake layer with a rainbow-colored ribbon, while leaving the rest of the cake plain. Discussing the design of your cake is as important as discussing the flavor—you’ll want both to be wholly reflective of the two of you.
Once the ceremony is over and it’s time to celebrate at the reception, mark your bridal chairs with Mrs. and Mrs. signs and let that written sentiment of you as a newly married couple carry by having them etched on your champagne glasses, flatware, and wherever else you want to see it and have it be part of your day.
You could craft a specialty Mrs. cocktail, showcase Mrs.-decorated cupcakes, and/or have your guests shower you with rainbow-colored confetti at the end of the night. There’s no shortage of ways to add LGBTQIA-friendly elements to your wedding day to make it feel warm and inviting.
Offering a take-home gift for guests is always a welcome treat at the end of the wedding. Fill small containers with multi-colored chocolate or fruit candies and attach a sweet note that says “Love in color” or “Love wins!” Pass out multi-colored balloons on strings and have each guest release them all at the same time to fill the sky with a rainbow of color from your wedding. It’ll create a memorable photo opportunity and allow everyone to feel connected through the celebration of your union.
When possible, support LGBTQIA-friendly vendors to work with you on details and ideas they may be more familiar with; it’s a way to honor the community and help you make your wedding vision come to life. Seeking vendors who specialize in lesbian weddings or who have a broader spectrum of experience will offer non-traditional ideas to weave in all that’s meaningful to you both as brides.
Planning a wedding is a fun, exciting time. It’s a way to incorporate each of your individual visions into one cohesive aesthetic that represents you both equally on your big day. Take the tradition of wedding ceremonies and make it your own by incorporating one-of-a-kind touches and clever nods to your personalities.
All wedding planning follows a similar timeline of choosing a venue, picking out wedding attire, selecting a reception menu, and organizing a guest list. The difference is in the details that will make your lesbian wedding feel unique and reflective of who you are. The day is about celebrating your partnership and a new commitment to each other. It should be filled with all the things that make you smile, laugh, and appreciate the love that you have and the support that surrounds you.