Wedding Party
Cindy Comeau
Mother of the Bride
I am who I am almost entirely because of my mother. Both through nurture and nature, my mom is the root of my feistiness, intelligence, passion, and heart. I have always known what I wanted in a partner because my mom ingrained in me the type of partner I deserved. It just so happens, that type of partner is more like her than I ever expected. You’re welcome, mom.
Tom Comeau
Father of the Bride
I'd like to believe I got my incredible humor from my dad. The strongest memories I have of my dad are of him laughing. I also like to believe that the reason I waited for someone like Ben to love and to partner with is because of the example I had in my father. I've been grieving the absence of my father at my wedding since I was a teenager. To be here without him is heartbreaking, however I feel his presence and joy in my heart and in the love I share with Ben. I also feel his presence in Ben's love of Hawaiian shirts, or what he calls his "summer sleaze" outfit. Dad would certainly approve.
Glen Watanabe
Father of the Groom
I'm not sure what age I was, but I would run and leap into my dad's arms when he got home from work. He was my first coach and did that cliché parent-coach thing by sitting me so other kids could play. He paid for the tennis club so we could play year round and get lessons. He drove me from track meets to baseball games with McDonalds stops in between. He got me guitars when I wanted to learn to play just like him. What I most take from my father as I become a husband is the value of providing financial security and stability for my family. It was an invaluable lesson modeled consistently, even in divorce, when his career trajectory could have been different with a move across the country. But he chose his children over himself. I hope to show my family the same devotion.
Leslie Crofoot
Mother of the Groom
What emotional intelligence I have can be traced to my mother. After sibling squabbles, instead of swats or removal of toys, we would be sent to timeout to write reflections of what happened. I hated those damn reflections, but they worked to calm ourselves and give her an account of what happened. She gave me journals to write in through my youth as well. Perhaps that set me on my track toward journalism. When I was heartbroken, I sought out my mother's wisdom and comfort. She has heartily welcomed Tamara and the Comeaus into her life (she always wanted a daughter, so a daughter-in-law will do at this point).
Nick Silling
Father of the Groom
I can't prove causation over correlation, but I know the following facts: My parents separated when I was 8 and divorced a few years later I was deeply unhappy during this time because it felt like the ground had turned to mud beneath me Once Nick and my mom began dating, the relationships between my mom and dad, as well as me with each of them, improved Nick shows me what unconditional love can be: unwavering support, steadfastness, calm in chaos. He helped support me through college and after, and beyond that, he let me worry a little less about my family because I trust him among us. If I can be close to what Nick is to my mother, I will be a good husband.
Trevor Lane
Officiant
Trevor Lane is the reason we met. Before we loved each other, we loved him. Without his friendship, we would be less as individuals and likely never have become sweethearts. Ben is forever indebted to him for listening and loving, as well as leading the way into teaching and encouraging him to become an educator. Trevor is an exceptional listener, curious to learn, and generous of spirit. Ben cherishes the many nights of music, Jurassic Park/Jaws/horror movies, and quiet time together. Tamara remembers meeting Trevor her first year of law school, being drawn to his authenticity and thoughtfulness. They sat in many front rows together, and Trevor was often able to hide behind Tamara's gregariousness in the classroom and social settings. Tamara was able to find solace in Trevor's comforting and calm aura, and similar understanding that life is infinitely deep, complicated, and beautiful.
Kaitlin Gobeille
Maid of Honor
Twin popsicles. Back in the early 2000s, if you were driving down our street, you would most likely find Kaitlin and I sunbathing on the sidewalk with our twin-pops in hand or selling snow cones on the corner. With Kaitlin I can act like the biggest idiot and know it will not be returned with judgment, but with even more idiotic behavior. With her, I am home. Kaitlin got married first and I was lucky enough to stand by her side then (more than 10 years ago!?). How lucky am I to have you by my side this time?
Steven Graham
Best Man
We met as enemies in elementary school. The hotshot new boy in school snaked my first love. I can't recall what bonded us by middle school other than having the same bus and being neighbors. By high school, we were practically Bert and Ernie. After high school, he made sure no college friends got through the friendship gauntlet without knowing he was first. No one has loved me so fiercely as Steven. He endured (and continues to endure) years of torment, moved me in as his roommate with minimal rent because I was unspeakably poor as an early career journalist, and literally kept me from collapsing after heartbreak in my youth. While he is quick to speak, also is he eager to listen and learn.
Courtney Blackburn
Maid of Honor
Gyoza. That is how we became friends just a few weeks after Ben and I fell in love. We bonded over our love of cooking, and also our love of our dogs, our passion for fighting for the underrepresented, and running! I admire Courtney's ability to consistently be present for others; she has shown me endless love in just 5 years of friendship. I also got to stand by Courtney’s side at her wedding a couple years ago, and feel grateful to have her by my side as well for my own wedding.
Jim Daly
Groomsman
I didn't like Jim's *thing* in middle school. Part of it was my perception of his identity wrapped in playing basketball. Part of it was neighborhood rivalry that only exists in the mind of a child. But Jim's charm and hospitality won out by high school and over the course of a season together playing baseball. Long live the Daly Double! I am blessed to have gained an entire family along with Jim, thanks to Jay, Sue, Mick, and Ryan. We chose our venue because of our affinity for Hood Canal thanks to the years of hospitality by the Dalys at their seaside cabin. Those bonds grew to include his wife, Quinn, and three children. Jim is earnest, gracious, helpful, steadfast. I think of his nimble feet on the basketball court, 40 McNugget orders, blended Long Island ice tea, lobster red sun burns, shower sleeping, reliability when I ran out of gas or needed a roommate, and love of cinema. In light of all of that, I have forgiven him for growing up in the adjacent neighborhood.
Natalie Bell
Bridesmate
School bus. I asked Nat to be my best friend on our first day of kindergarten on the school bus. Maybe that was my anxiety showing up early - needed to make sure I snagged Natalie as my bestie before anyone else could. Luckily it worked and I’ve had them in my clutches ever since. I appreciate the raw conversations Natalie and I have had over the decades, forever challenging my perspective and opening my eyes. I am who I am because of their influence and love.
Jake Lillie
Groomsman
Jake is the most natural and recent addition to my friend group. A kindred spirit found in the trenches of teacher grad school. He met my vulnerability in kind. When I thought I was alone in my reality of the teaching program, he assured me I was in good company. Jake is an adept listener, easy friend, and responsive mind. We talk about movies, literature, teaching, family, golf, and swap an absurd number of memes and social media. Perhaps his only shortcoming is also his great appeal to me: he is always happy to be my audience of one. I am rewarded exponentially by being his friend, and hope to be worthy of it in the days to come.
Yvette Steineman
Bridesmaid
Hannah Montana. Yes, that probably dates us. But we bonded over that movie and thus I will always have to thank Hannah Montana for her bringing Yvette into my life. My roommate for a good chunk of my life, we became adults together. I’ll never forget going to the gym together and then getting ice cream and BWWs. She's been a shoulder to lean on and warm arms to be held by through many parts of my life. Yvette is my soul sister and always will be.
Derek Johnston
Groomsman
When I met Derek, I hated him. He was an obnoxious sixth-grade bully. I'm not convinced that spirit ever left, but he has tempered it or at least directs it elsewhere now. Over a few baseball seasons together as teammates, we became great friends. His family hosted me and many of us for countless nights in our youth, including for at least two days in a row after I got my driver license. I adore your parents and still miss your father. Today, Derek is forthright, spirited, and sensitive. His competitiveness sharpens me on the golf course when we listen to our better angels instead of diving into the beverage cart, around a card table playing Risk for four hours, and over flurried messages during fantasy football. I admire his determination to secure a new career, pursue his art, and humility as a husband, and I am proud he is one of my closest friends.
Anna Casparius
Bridesmaid
Young Life. I’ll never forget that someone (maybe regrettably) decided to put you and I in charge of a group of college students. That certainly bonded us for life. Anna’s heart is what drew me to her. A true desire to give to and love on others. Not to mention a humor and wit that don’t quit. Anna and I grew up together during our 20s and have continued to stay near as we have grown into old ladies who go to bed at 8pm. A woman after my own heart.
Randy Minor
Groomsman
I couldn't stand Randy in middle school for many of the same reasons I didn't like Jim. I was as wrong about him as I have ever been about anything. We became friends by proxy of both being friends with Jim. I was terrible to Randy and respect him for standing up to me. Randy is, above all, committed to his family. I admire this about him more than any other virtue he possesses. There is no call for help that he has not answered. Moves. House projects. Hanging out. He is there, without fail. I am blessed to be called uncle by his children, to be known by his siblings and parents, and to have officiated his wedding. I smile when I recall his many blastoffs, raspy voice in a crowd, dancing at concerts, and ability to make time for me.
Emily Yoshiwara
Bridesmaid
Minnesota. Flashback to a couple years ago, when Emily and I, still new-ish coworkers, are sent on a company trip to a rundown moldy camp-like “resort” in Minnesota. Perhaps that experience bonded us in a way that we can never come back from. A true yapper that I know I can get lost in countless tangential conversations with. Emily didn’t know what hit her when she met me and I claimed her as my close friend. Despite abandoning her at that company, I will always keep her in my grasp. She inspires me to be a bad ass bitch in every part of my life, but especially as a lawyer.
Trevor Swezey
Groomsman
My friend since elementary school. We first bonded over baseball. I learned to play tennis because I wanted to be like him. Our middle school days were charmed by outrageous videography of antics and adolescent foolishness. High school was a riot at the “bum” table where lunch was a prison meal and seats had to be secured through an increasingly complex system of spot backs, no jack, no jack back. Upon his marriage, I was fortunate to be a groomsman for which my feet continue to recover from the hours of dancing (thanks to Priscilla, his lovely bride, and her family). He formed an award winning general construction business that hews to the same high standards he holds for himself. His generosity extends from his company into the communities in which he lives and works. I am blessed to have a friend as honest, stalwart, and generous as Trevor.