celebrating our love wherever we go

We had both lived in South Korea since 2018, but we didn't meet until 2020, all thanks to a chat for queer people in Korea! Addie had been a member of this chat for a while, but wasn't really an active member. I joined the chat in February of 2020. Addie had been traveling to the city where I lived (Jeonju) to visit a friend who lived there. But Addie felt she was surrounded by straight people! So, she messaged the chat to see if anyone lived in Jeonju. Right after that message, we spoke on the phone while Addie traveled via train back to her city (1.5 hours away). I felt lied to. Addie wasn't nearby at all! Despite this, we met each other a few times over various weekends. Addie had a huge crush, but her crush prevented her from being very kind to me, so nothing really grew other than a friendship between the only queers in that part of Korea. Thankfully, as time went on, Addie got advice from a good friend who suggested she show her feelings to me. After many months, Addie finally asked Valerie out on a proper date. After that, we were nearly inseparable. We couldn't meet often due to the distance and the pandemic, but we tried to meet consistently on the weekends. We would often just stay inside and talk, order delivery, and relish each other's company. In November of 2020, we decided it wouldn't work being long distance any more, and so Addie moved to Jeonju too! It's been hard balancing our love and desire for one another with the reality of living in a country that didn't recongize our relationship. I love the lifestyle that we had in Korea, but it wasn't sustainable for Addie. We came to the USA with the intention to visit and then return to Korea, but, for now, we want to stay in a country that recognizes our relationship. We love each other and enjoy spending every day together.

Addie and I started talking about getting engaged and had even been to look for rings at a department store. While there, Addie fell in love with a ruby ring that reminded Addie of her grandmother's ring. I went back later and bought the ring and stored it at my friend Megan's house until our upcoming trip to Jeju Island. In order to transport the ring, I kept it in my wallet which Addie never goes into. That is, until we arrived back at our accomodation the night before the proposal! I went to the bathroom while Addie looked for the key which was in my wallet. I was so disappointed that she might have seen the ring! "Did you see IT?" I asked. She thought I was hiding love notes to someone else! Just a simple miscommunication! After waking up to the sound of thunderstorms, we spent the day chasing waterfalls in the southern part of the island. I had a plan to propose to Addie on a beach as we watched the sunset. But we had to hurry! So I drove her to the beach only to find that it was closed. Determined to catch the sun, I made Addie power walk to a nearby coastal area (not quite beach, not quite parking lot). Thankfully, this isn’t unusual for me, so Addie had no idea what was going to happen. We sat on our picnic blanket, listened to music, and burned incense. While chatting about our future desire to live on the island, Addie proclaimed "I know being selfish is bad, but I want to be selfish! I want to marry you and have a great life together! Why can't we get married? But also there's no rush. There's no pressure. We can get engaged when it's right." I laughed, knowing the ring was going to be shared at any moment. As soon as she calmed down, I said "Well, being a little selfish isn't a bad thing." And I gave her the ring! She was overwhelmed! Poor Addie didn't say "yes" right away but made her adorable crying face. Eventually I got a "yes" (and a kiss!) and we celebrated at a nearby restaurant with a beautiful view of the full moon. It was unreal.

Knowing myself, I knew I couldn't keep a secret. So, Val's proposal wasn't a secret at all. To be honest, I couldn't wait to propose to her after she proposed to me! Instead of waiting until a special day, or warmer weather, or a nice place..yada yada yada... I chose the next available weekend! I called some friends, pulled some strings, and told Valerie to shower in preparation for our date (this was to be our clue word so that Valerie would do some makeup and look good for pictures!). I asked Valerie on a date with my only plan to be at the top of the hill overlooking the village at 4pm to propose in front of the photographers. After arriving at the Hanok Village, I said to Valerie, "Ok! So, what should we do?" Valerie, knowing it was a special day, took me to an incredibly special tea shop, an overlook where we had our first date, and simply wandered through the village. When it was time, I led Valerie up to the top of the hill. I was worried Val would see Chris hiding with his massive camera. Suddenly, I was really nervous! And although Valerie knew what was happening, the stage fright got to me. I was sweating a lot. Obviously she was going to say yes, but I think I'm not good with words (Valerie is typing this for me). There were also a few tourists and families, so I was nervous being in front of them. Valerie instantly saw a photographer with a massive camera and figured out what was going on. She helped me calm down, and finally, we walked over to a small bench. At the bench, we talked and I told her "I don't know how to do this or what to say, but I'm going to go down on my knee!" Valerie started crying as I asked her to spend the rest of her life with me. Chris jumped out of the bush! Val hadn't noticed him at all! She was shocked!!! We enjoyed taking some photos in the historical pavilion. Afterwards, we walked to our favorite restaurant, Ay Mamita and celebrated with an incredibly special meal and a picture of mojitos! We felt incredibly lucky to be surrounded by our friends during this proposal.