Maid of Honor
Bride's hometown friend. “Fla- flames. Flames. On the side of my face. Breathing - breathle- heaving breaths. Heaving -”
Best Man
A tired, old man.
Bridesmaid
College friend. Will take nonsense from no one and snacks from anyone.
Groomsman
A man my older sister dragged home.
Bridesmaid
Bride’s (only) sister. She’s beauty and she’s grace ~ She may have a book in her face ~
Groomsman
Present when I visited Shannon.
Bridesmaid
Groom's younger sister. A vibe, honestly.
Groomsman
A man my little sister dragged home.
Bridesmaid
College friend. The schedule is law, and anyone not on time will be prosecuted.
Groomsman
A man. Living. French?
Bridesmaid
College roommate. Probably should have an AirTag.
Groomswoman
Most improved.
Bridesmaid
College friend. Sugar and spice and— Jeez, that really is a lot of spice.
Groomsman
Unhinged, but a gentleman.
Flower Girl
Product of my older sister dragging that man home.
Ring Bearer
Bride’s cousin. Though our wedding is a bridesmaid’s birthday, absolutely no one is to sing the Happy Birthday song if he is in earshot. This is for the best.