Gallery

Every Fort Myers sunset comes with photo shoots. And every photo shoot comes with jumping photos.

The Fisherman's Quarter in Budapest is stupidly named because there's no fish there.

Nowhere does Cozy Christmas Fantasy like Minnesota does.

There's this nifty lighthouse in Jupiter, Florida that can only be reached by boat. I assume.

Opera is big in Vienna but for some reason they placed us behind the orchestra. Not exactly front row seats. More like -1 row seats.

In Geneva, they ride boats more often than they drive cars. That's really true! Don't look it up.

Stonehenge is one of things that you do to say you did it. Yep, that's some big rocks they stacked there. Wow. Huh. Wow.

Jenkins's wedding was a swell time and I guarantee we will not have as elaborate of a coordinated dance for our first dance.

Cambridge is a lovely destination for a wedding. I thought they were joking when they said, "Okay, get in this gondola in your fancy suits." But no they were 100% serious about that.

The V sign was not cultural appropriation. They asked us to do that when they were taking our photo.

All this talk about London bridges falling down but in our experience they were pretty solid.

This was wedding number two in the same weekend in two different states. Don't say that we are not experienced wedding attendees. Now it is time to put our experience to the test.

Castles and government buildings are one in the same in Vienna.

Landing in Japan was a surreal experience, having grown up in Florida. Disney World's Epcot presents facsimiles of all these locales so when you go to the actual places, it feels a little Disney World.

London is a swell place. That's it, that's the commentary. I'm so good at this.

Minnesotans have a suicidal willingness to walk on their lakes during winter. Not shown in this picture is the sheer terror that I was grappling with at the time.

Bamboo forests in Japan weren't as common as you'd think.

I'll never take a serious photo you can't make me. Watch, at the wedding I'm gonna be making stupid faces.

When we booked a nighttime harbor ride in Hong Kong, we were rather amused that they just slapped a sticker on us to denote what services we paid for, because it felt like we were cargo being shipped.

Gays are famously unoriginal so this was the only the 1,000th Louvre thieves Halloween costume out in Atlanta.

RIP "Only For Now." The boat gays in Gay Cove shall have to go without us.

I was stunned to learn that Morocco was about the size of California. Our trip through the Atlas mountains definitely proved the country was way more than just desert.

Winters in Minnesota have spoiled me for any other amount of snow. Oh, you have a light dusting? Pedestrian.

This, I can say, was taken on what was probably the coolest day of my life. I flew to Morocco because I wanted desert, and in Erg Chebbi, I got desert.

Vietnam was fun because while we were on a tour, we kept being pointed out "Here's where the Americans bombed us." And we had to keep being like, "Yeah... our bad... sorry...."

I'd never been to the botanical gardens before meeting Matthew. I thought it was just a stupid bunch of plants. Having been a few times now, they're still stupid and also boring. But Matthew likes it.

"Winter Wonderland" always seemed like just a cute saying from a Christmas song but in northern Minnesota, it is for real an alien planet.

Chefchouen, the blue city, is this lovely little town nestled in the Atlas mountains. Why is it blue? Literally no one knows.

My first birthday with Matthew. I wasn't even thirty then omg.

The dinner from Hell in New Orleans. It crossed the event horizon from being disappointing to bad to hilariously absurd at how atrocious it was. It was legendary 10/10 recommend.

The Keys are something else. And when you have a stellar day, you are contractually obligated to go into the ocean, drop anchor, and chill.

Bangkok is an amazing city. I found out about a park that has a bunch of monitor lizards and I demanded that Matthew go with me to see the park with the monitor lizards.

You can blame Conall and Erica for convincing us that destination weddings are a good idea, because we had an amazing time at theirs in Assisi.

Work trips when you have a bunch of down time are awesome. Especially in countries as cheap as Thailand. I came out having MADE money through my per diem.

It's kind of annoying how California gets to have the best weather in the world. At least the traffic in Los Angeles is legit terrible yes we experienced it.

The deer in Nara are legit everywhere. I thought it was going to be a struggle to get photos with them but it was more difficult keeping those fuckers out of our shot.