Wedding Party

Marissa Andrea Mota

Bride

Javier David Burdette

Groom

Leonela Victoria Mota

Maid of Honor

Vice President. DiCaprio step aside, there's a new Leo in town. And like Mr. DiCap, this Leo is an artist of the highest caliber. We would've had her doing the photography, videography, candles, and flowers, if we didn't already have her working security. A true international woman of mystery, Leo is as much at home on the streets of Seoul as she is the halls of Berghain. Catch her if you can!

John Patrick Max Morales

Groomsman

A man of many names and at least two talents, Max is living proof that you can, in fact, teach an old dog new tricks (if you can offer him a bone, that is). If you have a hard time spotting him, just look for the guy with a smile that spans the Finger Lakes. He'll be sure to greet you with a big hug and a "Hey Buuddyyyy!!!!"

Sophia Sade Burdette

Bridesmaid

Enigma. noun. A perplexing, baffling, or seemingly inexplicable matter, person, etc. What machinations are going on behind those little brown eyes? Perhaps Minecraft videos. Perhaps plans for a new arts-and-crafts project. Perhaps nothing at all (DISCLAIMER: Written by Javi). With a middle name like Sade, Soph may have been born to be a smooth operator but, like Javi, she's got a propensity of goofiness, so don't be shy.

Matthew Scott Seah

Groomsman

Everyone please thank Matt for postponing his People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive photoshoot in order to be here. Ryan Gosling. Ryan Reynolds. Matthew Seah. Why is it that all the biggest hunks come from Canada? Must be something in the water, eh? Tempted as you may be, please don't post any photos of yourself with Matt as he is a currently wanted man, not only by us, but also by the Singaporean government. Thanks.

Claudia Puga

Bridesmaid

Sec. of Health and Human Services. When Keeping it Real Goes Right: The Claudia Puga story. Claudia is a real one in every sense of the word. She's gonna ride for you 'til the wheels fall off, but she's also gonna be honest with you and let you know what's up no matter what! Furthermore, you have not lived until you have partied with Claudia Puga. If you do not take a shot of tequila with her at some point during the reception, why'd you even show up?

Marco (Poni) Puga

Groomsman

Slept poorly and woke up with a kink in your neck? Luckily, we have a guy for that. While we're on the subject of busy hands, let us all put our own hands together to give a warm welcome to Marco, AKA Poni, who you're as likely to find doing the Lord's work standing over a massage table as you are headbanging in a moshpit. He's a sick time, we guarantee it.

Celeste Castillo

Bridesmaid

Sec. of Ed. When basic b*tches wake up each day, they must ask themselves, "Am I Monica, Rachel, or Phoebe today? Yonce, Kelly, or Michelle? Kim, Khloe, or Kourtney? " When Celeste wakes up, she asks, " Am I SpongeBob, Patrick, or Squidward?" In French, "Celeste" is a name that evokes the heavens, and Celeste Castillo is an individual whose star shines bright indeed. Whether you have a question about the geography of Bikini Bottom, the finer points of home renovation, or Freudian psychoanalysis, she is sure to have an answer. You just gotta ask.

Yash Gandhi Mehta

Groomsman

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and what happens in the stock market may just lead you to generational wealth. That's the motto by which Yash lives, and all of us should follow suit. Unlike the rest of Javi's law school crew, we don't recommend that you go looking for Yash simply because he is sure to be posted up somewhere too cutty for you to find (or just check the smoking section).

Yvonette Fuentes

Bridesmaid

Attorney General. "Cowboy boots or heels?" that is the question. For Yvonette, the answer is simply, "Yes." A gal who is as comfortable on the range as she is in court, Yvonette holds it down come hell or high water. A true Mama Bear, a gifted interlocutor, and a certified party girl, you never know what Yvonette is going to bring to the table, but you do know what the result is going to be: A good time.

Albert Labaria

Groomsman

I have a dream that one day, from the hallowed halls of Tuscaloosa, to the mean streets of Washington D.C. the legend of a rock-climbing phenom with luscious locks by the name of Albert Labaria will be known. While Albie's adventures may be the thing of pure myth, his status as an amazing friend is anchored firmly in reality. All hail Fozzy, the man who can light a dart off a bonfire and eats V6s for breakfast.

Sohnjay Elisjah Reeve

Bridesman

Sec. of Energy. Eclectic. Eccentric. Exquisite. More apt words could not be used to describe former roommate and longtime friend of the show Sohnjay Elisjah Reeve. The Crowned Prince of the San Francisco classical music scene, Sohnjay is a french horn virtuoso. He can also slappa da uke. He also holds the Guinness World Record for Tallest Water Pour. He'd be more than happy to show you what exactly that means.

Danny Lee Drane

Groomsman

Yes, yes his name may sound like it belongs to a Confederate general, but we guarantee Danny is quite the agreeable customer - as long as you can stay on the right side of his trusty set of pirate die, that is. People say he looks like Chesa Boudin, but we'd never put his name in the same sentence as that criminal. If you can't find him, well, just look for Max. They'll likely both be stumbling off the dance floor. Call 1-800-GAMBLER (1-800-426-2537) to connect with a live, master's-level counselor any time, day or night.

Claire Webster

Bridesman

Speaker of the House. C. Webby, as I live and breathe! Hailing from the land where the Missouri and Mississippi rivers make their confluence, Claire is as much at home in Congress as they are at a rowdy sporting event. First and foremost a people person, Claire's special powers include remembering every single detail of your life. When Marissa is ultimately President, rest assured that Claire will be right there in the White House with her, jogging around the grounds and enjoying ice cream together, just as their forefathers did. CBOOM!

Alexis Brown

Bridesmaid

Believe it or not, Alexis believes she's an "old soul"! This may be accurate considering how early she goes to bed. She does, however, like to keep up with the young folk and leads the jet set life of someone half her age. If Drake were to "write" a song about her, he'd have to title it Houstatlantavegaswashinewyormiddletown or something. Her friendship with Marissa is truly one for the ages, and the best advertising Bumble BFF could ever ask for.

Juan Carlos Reyes

Groomsman

Certified Lover Boy? Certified good guy. He may not be THE J.C., but he's a man who does the Lord's work regardless. He's a teacher by day and a superhero...enthusiast by night. His knowledge of the Marvel and DC pantheons is rivaled only by his knowledge of futbol. He is rumored to have a Hulk-esque alter-ego, El Tanque, which terrorized the Santa Barbara area for four years. Let's just say you won't like him when he's thirsty...

Sukhnoor Singh Kahlon

Groomsman

Medicine. Philosophy. Indian-Mexican fusion cuisine. What can't he do? Sukhnoor, AKA Noor, is the descendant of kings, and it shows through his acumen in everything he touches. He is almost singlehandedly responsible for the AP nerds' academic success. Unfortunately, no one is perfect. In Noor's case, he's a Lakers fan. But we can look past that.

Akemi Trodden Akaiwa

Bridesmaid

Liam's way, way, way better better half, Akemi is a SoCal Gal turned propa New Yorka. She is also into knitting and hula, and is in constant pursuit of the perfect IG story photo of a craft cocktail (she makes NYC look genuinely serene and not like the rat-infested Gotham it truly is; you really must see it). She is also an avid Hispanophone always seeking to improve her skills, so please address her exclusively in Spanish.

Liam Trodden

Groomsman

Liam is Javi's friend from an era the latter likes to call the TWOM (Time Without Marissa). While our lovebirds were doing long distance, Liam was there to be Javi's companion, confidant, and, most importantly, chauffeur (whose tunes are GUARANTEED to bump in the whip). A true SoCal DUDE, please do not be offended if Liam shows up in a pair of flip flops and shorts. That is simply his tubular nature.

Jocelyn Madrid

Bridesmaid

Exec Sec. Favorite animal? Otters. Favorite food? Veggies. Favorite musician? Billie Eilish. Favorite home fixture? The pipes. Favorite phrase? "Marissa with the purse." What does this all mean? Ayayay muchacha, that is honestly a question only Jocy and Diosito himself can answer. All we can truly know is that Jocelyn is the funniest person we ever did meet. If you don't see her around, just keep your ears open and you should hear Julian, Anahi, and Lani screaming with laughter soon enough.

Leilani Zoria

Flower Girl

If you need a case study proving that girls mature faster than boys, look no farther than Leilani Zoria. Calling Lani precocious would be an understatement. To be entirely honest, the task of carrying the flowers is far below her, but we already hired a coordinator, so she'll just have to make due. If you need some talking points, her resume lists some of her personal interests as: Ariana Grande, dogs (see Exhibit A, pictured above), and quantum theory.

Erick Mota

Ring Bearer

Ladies love him. Gentlemen respect him. Building blocks fear him. Though Erick is new to this whole "walking" thing, we have full faith that he will make it to the altar. However, as Frodo Baggins can attest, bearing a ring is a heavy burden for anyone, so if you see him being led astray by any colorful objects, rocks, or sticks, please give him a gentle nudge in the right direction.