C & R

Raymond and Chuck connected on Match.com. Although Chuck had tried the app he eventually became disillusioned, being too busy he forgot to cancel. Raymond had only heard of dating websites but after his spouse sadly passed, he came to realize he sorely missed companionship. When he became ready he thought to try it. On his first time he came across Chuck's post and liked a photo of him in which he looked like the Fonz from Happy Days, so naturally, he swiped. Within a few days, this led to a request to talk and was followed by an intriguing first phone call on July 9th, 2022. Chuck called from Kwik Trip in Lake Mills, WI and ended when he arrived home an hour and 1/2 later in Grayslake. On the call they awkwardly and comfortably talked about plenty and planned on meeting in person for a "dutch-treat" dinner at The Shanty on Hwy 41. Liking who they met and because conversation lingered to the outside patio and into the parking lot decided to meet again. A 2nd date was at The Hob-Nob, Racine. Both found each other to be simpatico and ever since that second date, they knew they were Bashert (Yiddish for soulmate or divinely destined). In fact, the design on their ketubah (traditional Jewish marriage contract) is entitled "Bashert". Subsequent dates included Lake Forest and ultimately an overnight trip for Chuck to Milwaukee where a 200th birthday party of Frederick Law Olmsted the Father of Landscape Architecture happened to be going on. Learning about their different religious and cultural backgrounds was amazing and sometimes confusing—there are many differences as well as similarities. As a couple they share Germanic and Polish heritage. They thought they may struggle with a common prayer life, but it really wasn't too difficult as they both respect each other’s experiences and have learned how to pray together. Neither of them bothered to date anyone else as they were both very content with one another. They knew well into their first December together that they were in LOVE. Chuck says he "fell" earlier at a September Pridefest in Madison, and Raymond felt the love coming along from the beginning. They knew they were on the right path and enjoyed their not so long distance relationship. They often spoke of their future as always being together—and reflected on awareness that they were indeed traveling on a meant to be path. Not always optimists--challenging naive destiny concepts they came back to honest reality and knowing how thankful they are for finding each other. They know they both like the preferred life, respect for elders, history, a good laugh, art, design, sharing/appreciating differences in music, theater, the symphony, ballet/dance, nature, Door County, hair products, Joshua the boycat, Chuck's Mom and friends who are like family, Raymond's family, roadtrips, Rummikub, nachos, creme brûlée, latte's and some GF (Gluten Free and also Gay Friendly) options. They've shared a couple of health scares, each other's surgeries and some rotten COVID experiences, yet always found a way with their common spirituality. That process has evolved perfectly into respect for and participating in each other's religious rituals. They learned in Catholic teaching that the primary goal of marriage is for each spouse to help the other get to heaven—a tall order but will do it. They officially engaged at a romantic dinner orchestrated by Chuck at Sanford's, Milwaukee on Oct 26, 2024. Marriage had been brought up "here and there" but this was the proposal date and both agreed to marry. They then played around with ideas of when/where. In June, 2025 at a Pride Festival, just for fun, they saw a clairvoyant who predicted a WINTER wedding. Winter wasn't a season in any discussions but their first pick for a date—February 14 seemed romantically right and thought it would make our carnival clairvoyant accurate. However, as you can tell, our first day as Mr & Mr is also one of the first few days of Spring and the weather will be bashert.