FAQs

Question

How do I RSVP?

Answer

As of March 31, we’re no longer accepting RSVPs through this site. Please e-mail Lane at fharwell@gmail.com if you have an update.

Question

What does the couple want?

Answer

Above all, we want to celebrate with our friends and family. If you're looking for a gift, we included a few items we love on our wedding registry.

Question

What's the couple's local address?

Answer

The happy couple's San Francisco address is 666 Post Street, Apt. 602, San Francisco, CA, 94109.

Question

But Lane lives in NYC?

Answer

Yes! Lane's job and residence are in New York, but their heart is in San Francisco. We hope to find an opportunity to gather our NY friends on the East Coast soon.

Question

Where should I stay?

Answer

We recommend staying in San Francisco's Union Square, Civic Center, Castro, or Mission districts, given their proximity to the wedding venues. As we have only a few friends and family members traveling in, we didn't book a hotel block. We included a few hotel recommendations on the travel section of this website.

Question

How do I get around?

Answer

We're not providing transportation between wedding venues. We recommend using Lyft, BART, Muni, or Baywheels, the local bikeshare service, to get around the city.

Question

Do I need to rent a car?

Answer

No! Our hotel recommendations and the wedding venues are near each other. San Francisco has good public transportation. See our travel page for more. If you rent a car, or travel in, we advise you not to leave anything in your car to avoid theft.

Question

Is San Francisco safe?

Answer

We feel safe in San Francisco. The city is welcoming of LGBTQIA+, trans and gender expansive, and disability communities. Violent crime is low. However, it has a large unhoused population, and drug abuse and theft are problems. You may wish to avoid the Tenderloin district as a precaution. If you are traveling by car, please leave NOTHING in your car to avoid theft.

Question

What's the weather like?

Answer

There's a famous quote often misattributed to Mark Twain: "The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco." Bring layers.

Question

What should I wear?

Answer

Be yourself. Be festive. Wear whatever you want — really. Our color recommendation: white. Weather in San Francisco varies, but is generally cool. Bring layers.

Question

Who's coming?

Answer

Our San Francisco community, our families, and a few special out-of-town guests. We hope to organize a New York City gathering for our East Coast friends soon.

Question

Can I bring a guest?

Answer

Sure! If the RSVP page does not give you that option, let Lane know at fharwell@gmail.com.

Question

Are kids welcome?

Answer

Yes! We love kids and welcome recommendations for kids' activities.

Question

Are the venues ADA compliant?

Answer

The private ceremony will be held at City Hall, which is ADA compliant. Most of our activities will be held in private residencies, which are not ADA compliant and require the use of stairs. Please let marrier Lane Harwell (fharwell@gmail.com) know if you have access needs.

Question

Access needs?

Answer

Please reach out to marrier Lane Harwell (fharwell@gmail.com) with your access needs, and we'll make a best effort to accommodate them.

Question

Covid protocols?

Answer

We recommend guests receive Covid vaccinations, including the latest booster shots, and test for Covid prior to the wedding. We won't be checking vaccination records or tests.

Question

What if I'm sick?

Answer

If you feel sick, we ask that you stay home, for the health and safety of all guests.

Question

What are the couple's pronouns?

Answer

Lane is nonbinary and uses the pronouns they or he. John-Paul's pronouns are he or they. We have both embraced the gender-neutral term marrier instead of bride or groom.

Question

Where's the full schedule?

Answer

Only the wedding reception and park outing are visible on the public schedule page of our wedding website. You need to visit your personal RSVP page for additional private activities for family, out-of-town guests, and those of us celebrating Pride month. Lane also sent you google calendar invitations for all activities you RSVPd for, in order to help you plan.