Matron of Honor
We met in Durham the summer before 6th grade and she has been by my side ever since. Sister by choice.
Best Man
Jason's little brother. Probably adopted
Bridesmaid
My favorite Jew“ish” woman. Adopted me as one of the Molayems when I moved to LA. A blunt and beautiful bestie.
Groomsman
I only have him up here for Braves tickets
Bridesmaid
My twin cousin. Began as arch enemies. Ended up as great friends.
Groomsman
Paul Brown somehow made it to America despite the travel ban from the UK. I just need to keep him in one spot long enough for the proper authorities to come get him
Bridesmaid
Longest not-related-by-blood friend (I was 6. She was 4). Family vacations and sleepovers to festivals and nights out. She took me under her wing and let me live with her when I first moved to San Diego.
Groomsman
Fraternity brother and Vietnamese. Also cannot be trusted. There are tunnels probably being built under the hotel as we speak
Bridesmaid
My twinny (We have the same birthday. She’s just a few hours older)! We met at UCSB and have since traveled the world together and even lived together!
Groomsman
Loves kids
Bridesmaid
We both had a thirst for “doing all the things”, so we became gypsy sisters and the rest is history.
Groomswoman
Possible Patient Zero of the Coronavirus
Bridesmaid
“Hey, you are tall like me. Want to be friends?” The criteria for friendship at UCSB was minimal and thank god for that. It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship. She also made my transition to living in Chicago seamless and awesome.
Officiant
I did his wedding so he owes me one
Bridesmaid
Our friendship has been one long string of situations that sounds neither real, nor possible. We communicate fluently in Translyvanian. We are bonded in mutual weirdness and love.