John & Alyssa

Wedding Party

Best Man

Stank ass, don’t brush his teeth, but he’s sweet and has potential.

Bridesmaid

Rubs snot and spit on everything in reach. Super farty, but proud to call her our daughter.

Groomsman

Has a chronic yeast-infected ear and skin cancer. Lives an alternative lifestyle and won’t ever move out of the basement.

For all the days along the way