Brooke & Cory
Wedding Party
Brooke Clark
Bride
The bizarro version of the hit early 2000's sitcom, The King of Queens, this Queen of Kings will be sure to dominate the show tonight. Cory can make all the wise-cracks he wants on the website and introduce his groomsman as if they are the '98 Bulls, but in his heart of hearts, he knows who the boss is. One look at this elegant bride-to-be and you can see why Cory fell so hard, but looks aren't everything, as any wise man knows, this beautiful shell houses the kindest heart and most beautiful soul. She is the reason for all of this, the reason for this day and the reason we celebrate, because without the bravery displayed by her to take a chance on love, Cory would be sitting on a couch somewhere dreaming of a girl like her.
Cory Blane
Groom
Your starting point guard, standing at 6'1.75", weighing in at the plump weight of 200 pounds, he once ate 10 buttermilk pancakes at an all you can eat IHOP special and supposedly can "bench 'like' 315#". Some individuals lucky enough to be close to him report that he is so dedicated to his boberry biscuit body that he eats the chocolate off of a bar, sucks on it for a little bit and then spits it out as to not tarnish his temple with impurities. Fans should expect to see him take plenty of shots tonight as he leads his team to victory.
Bethany Clark Borkoski
Matron of Honor
Hold on to your horses ladies and gentlemen, the Bruce Buffer of matrons of honor is here to be the ultimate hype woman tonight. The mother of two dogs and wife to Dave, Bethany moonlights as a writer (especially if you're lucky enough to get any card celebrating anything). Expect to see this all-around happy gal supporting the whole squad from sun up to sun down with a laugh more contagious than yawns and a glass of red in both hands!
Christian Groomes
Best Man
Your shooting guard tonight will be making it rain all night long, bringing the drip in his slate blue suit. Expect to see plenty of action from him as a close #2 to the groom. He shoots the deep ball better than Curry and drives the lane with a furry matching Harden. Expect to see this electric player walking at a brisk pace down the aisle and pay special attention to the finesse with the transfer of the rings late in the reception. By the end of the night, this former Tiger will rally the team like papa Dabo does each Saturday they aren't playing Bama to help bring home the win.
Brittany Clark Collins
Matron of Honor
The stately mother of both flower girls and trendsetter of the group, Brittany is the oldest sister of the 'Clark Clan' but age hasn't dampened her spirit, this lively momma is a tenaciously fun-time and we can no doubt expect to see her in action September 10 on the dance floor. She enjoys sipping sangria and, if tempted, chugging red wine, letting her hair down and leading the party-girl charge. Expect to see her with both cute as can be kiddos, rocking a big smile and holstering a happy heart all night long!
Derek Foltz
Groomsman
This rookie small forward is emerging quickly as the Pipen to Cory's Jordan, the Lola to Cory's Buggs, and if we really want to stretch things, the ratty sneakers to Cory's Calvin Cambridge. As if we didn't hype this young prodigy up enough, rumor has it he plans to lead the charge on the charcuterie board tonight, intending to eat his bodyweight in cheese and crackers. Expect to see immaculate hair and a sturdy jawline on this one as he dresses to impress, but don't let the peticured exterior fool you, this cool cat will let his hair down and rock & roll all night.
Sarah Chang
Bridesmaid
Never one to back away from a good time, this queen of spunk is ready to rock-and-roll all the way down the aisle! After the recent fall of the Lannister's, this reigning "Queen of the North (America)", has a PHD in having fun. You can just call her Sarah though, the whole Queen of the North thing was cheesy, I know, but this website is my oyster. On a serious note, if you get the chance, talk to this friendly face and I promise you, by the end of the conversation she'll have you wanting to move up to Arlington!
Ryan Blane
Groomsman
Starting at center, this post man can be fed all night long and expect to see dishes passed in from the perimeter all night. The one who thinks he is taller than the groom but that's only because the groom is never wearing shows in photos together. This highly touted recruit jumped straight from the G League to the NBA for his debut tonight. The brother of the groom, expect to see him be a viable asset down the stretch tonight when the groom gets tired late in the 4th.
Harli Price
Bridesmaid
A long-time best-friend of the bride and resident flower child, Harli is here to steer the emotional boat. The mother of three dogs and husband to Solomon, this bridesmaid will be in a hearty competition of "who cries most" against the groom. Harli holds the unique characteristic of being a long time friend of both Cory and Brooke, with Cory working with her as a teacher assistant dating back to the awkward, pre-teen middle school days. Not one to shy away from a good time, and a good laugh, expect to see Harli making wise-cracks and holding the heart-strings of the bride.
Kyle Blane
Groomsman
Starting at power forward, another brother of the groom can expect to see action early as he take shots early and often. This long time veteran of the league is a recent transfer in from the Monstar's. Unrecognizable from his early days in the league back in 1996, he has spent time bouncing around the league playing with the likes of Jackie Moon, Jesus Shuttlesworth and even Billy Hoyle.
Clarke Elise Collins
Flower Girl
Clarke "Cute-Elise" Collins as she is commonly referred to, is undoubtedly going to steal the show tonight. Second to none, this cute little nugget will toss flowers with more elegance than the flap of a butterflies wings, smile with a brightness that will outshine the sun and release a laugh that can melt even the coldest of hearts. Want to get on her good side? Give this girl a cup of 'molk' and a slice and cake and she'll love you forever.
Connley Beth Collins
Flower Child
Connley Beth, a.k.a. the Chonker, is the happiest baby the world may have ever seen. She literally only smiles, and on the best day of our lives, the smiling flower child will be walking down the aisle with her loving big sister. Maybe she'll toss a flower? Maybe she’ll eat it? Only time will tell with this ball of joy, but one thing is for sure, Connley Beth will melt your heart.