Our adventure begins!

Many of you are probably wondering why #adventuresofbearandape is our wedding hashtag -- well, to explain -- we are Bear and Ape and we love capturing our adventures! Ha! Ape has been a nickname for April forever; when we met, she owned her own bakery - Ape's Cakes. Bear is a bit of a newer nickname for Kayla though -- first there was Kayla Cat, then Kayla Bear Cat, and eventually it was all shortened to just Bear. The nickname started between the two of us, as well as with April's niece and nephews, and over time, it just stuck. We refer to each other as Ape and Bear, our nieces and nephews call us Auntie Ape and Auntie Bear, and to Jack and Sally we are Momma Ape and Momma Bear. At this point, I know something is wrong (or I'm in trouble! ha) when Ape calls me Kayla -- and sometimes after spending a few days together (most recently after a big snowstorm we had) and then I'm back at work, I am surprised when people call me Kayla. The name has spread to some of our friends, family, etc. -- and we suppose we will be sticking with it. So, now you know the history of the hashtag (and also, if you search it now, you'll find adventures from throughout our relationship!). We're so excited to share in our #adventuresofbearandape with all of you!

I met the girl I will marry this November on a hopeless dating app. We clicked immediately and I was eager to find out everything about her that she would let me. I finally convinced her to let me take her for wings and drinks one August evening (which she likes to point out that I wore long sleeves). We were both very nervous but after a few minutes it felt like we knew each other for years and as it turned out we had a lot in common. We kept each other laughing the entire evening. A few months after getting to know each other we planned a drive out to the mountains. That trip was probably when I realized I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. The day was perfect, we had picnicked on the Blue Ridge Parkway, drove for hours singing to our favorite show tunes and falling in love with every little conversation confirming my feelings. That evening on our way back from carving our initials into a special tree I confessed that I loved her. Since that moment, I’ve been falling more and more every day. Then, I did the thing. I bought the ring. I asked her parents if they were okay with me asking her. After all was a go and the sneaking around gave me ulcers I couldn’t wait anymore. After another almost perfect day, I thought why wait anymore? I had been lugging the ring around with me everywhere just in case the right moment presented itself. We spent the day together at a conference in Washington DC (one of my favorite places (for Art, not politics)). We had been talking and laughing about nothing and having the best time for hours and then I pulled out the ring and I have never seen her more speechless or confused. She asked multiple times if it was real and if I was kidding. I wasn’t. Lots has happened since the proposal, all just confirming how much I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I can’t wait to see what crazy #adventuresofbearandape await but it’s been a blast so far.

Our story began in August 2015. We met on Tinder (and I’m not ashamed because #itwas2015 and also #introvertproblems) in August right after I moved to Winston-Salem -- I was excited and anxious in a new place, 26 and happily single...so of course the cliche about love finding you when you aren’t looking came true. Our first date was at an East Coast Wings shortly after we swiped right. I don’t remember every detail from the night, but the summary includes lots of laughter, me telling ridiculous stories, some light teasing (apparently I drive a mom car, and who wears long sleeves in August, April?), and ended with a hug and a hope that this wasn’t the last time I saw her. Obviously, it wasn’t -- the next thing I knew, it was October and I accidentally referred to her as my girlfriend in conversation, prompting us to ‘make it official’ on October 8, 2015. Those first months together included big things - a day trip to Asheville that really sealed our compatibility, taking Ape home to meet my family and see where my roots still live, celebrating my ‘Golden” birthday -- but our love came together in the little things, like late nights washing dishes and hanging out at Ape’s Cakes, discovering shared interests {all the board games and dance parties}, and sharing new things with each other (April learned a lot about football very quickly -- I learned the intricacies of cake decorating art). There are moments that stick out -- like when I broke my arm 7 months into our relationship, and April stuck by my side throughout the whole thing...and when I broke my ankle 13 months later... When we went to DC for 48 hours and crammed in non-stop with adventures to celebrate her 26th birthday. Every trip to Asheville - parkway driving, wineries, comedy tours, exploring, and that one sketchy arcade. Dancing the night away at Molly’s wedding where the people I love met the person who stole my heart. Every single time April convinces someone to play Brown-Eyed Girl for me.

Somewhere in 2017 we started to discuss getting married, and while I knew we were committed, I didn’t think much about it, I suppose? So around 11:50 pm on Thursday, January 25, 2018, in our hotel room for the Creating Change conference in Washington D.C., April completely surprised me with a proposal, which, after several “oh my goodness is this for real?”s and “are you serious?”s, I happily accepted. The proposal wasn’t a grand gesture but rather a perfect culmination - she had driven up the night before to join me in D.C., and little did I know, she had MANY surprises for me that weekend. Thursday night included dinner with my students - April tried Indian food for the first time and was not impressed, the usual networking and socials, and what felt like hours of us literally laughing until we were crying over nothing in particular...so, pretty much our usual. All of a sudden, she was like “do you want to remember this moment forever?”, and the next thing I knew she was holding out a ring. So, the details are a blur, but I will for sure remember that moment forever. [For the record, she had hoped to hold out until my birthday and propose in front of the pandas at the National Zoo but she couldn’t wait -- and honestly, I’m glad she didn’t because I was so excited to see the pandas, I think if she had also proposed the overload of emotions may have been the end for me.] Since getting engaged, I feel like our love has only deepened -- we’ve been through big life events, like the loss of April’s dad and buying a house together, and we’ve also continued all of the little things of building a life together -- I mean, committing to the fact that we’re always going to be a two-ketchup household just seemed like an important decision. As we get closer to our wedding, I don’t feel at all nervous about us spending our lives together -- just about planning a day that celebrates our love with as much joy as I feel every single day.