Nothing is more romantic than a candle lit dinner, especially when it can't burn your home or loved ones to a crisp.

Living with two cats that you're both allergic to is made much easier by our air purifiers. It's not easy being a lesbian, thanks for helping us breathe.

The plastic walls of our fridge are somehow warping and i’m convinced it is actively rebeling against us. None of our shelves actually fit anymore, and ingredients are constantly falling on us or getting crushed when they slip. This fund will help save us from flying milk cartons and sad trips to the grocery store for more eggs.

I’m going to be real with you, our backyard is a hot mess. The previous owner had 5 dogs that must have found the fence to be absolutely delicious. We would love to pave some of the area, mostly so Lexie doesn’t have to see Dara’s industrial sized smoker every time she looks out the door, and also have a little garden in the corner that currently has a gigantic tree stump in it.

Our several mismatched clearance section sheets have served their time (and then some) Help us finally invest in some high-quality adult sheets that don't feel like sleeping on a Dollar Tree paper towel

For safely storing Lexie's liquid gold ginger-turmeric shots, strong enough to scare away colds and bad vibes (And also Dara)

Hopefully this safe lives a long, boring life doing absolutely nothing but holding our important documents while hoping Dara doesn't lose the keys (Lexie will be insisting on holding onto them)

Homes for the plants that Lexie uses to create the Rainforest cafe in our home!

Help Gordina Ramsey AKA Dara in her culinary endeavors to feed Lexie and all who walk through our doors.

With this purchase you can help Lexie (And sometimes Dara) clean up cat puke without having to hand scrub it out of our carpets while screaming.

Please help us replace our mismatched glasses from random wineries

Glasses for our tasteful dinner parties

Help the chronically cold Lexie stay warm and toasty, I'm sure the pets won't mind warm blankets either

Aid Lexie in all her baking endeavors because if you need any dessert catered, it'll probably be from her kitchen.

For some reason Lexie is obsessed with cloth napkins and scalloped edges, so why not have both? Help our dinner parties look more aestheticly pleasing.

Help Dara replace the destroyed rope on our cat scratchers to purr-suade our boys to not destroy our furniture next. We are at their mercy.

Help Lexie and Juniper not get run over in the dead of night with this stylish rave harness.

As if Dara needs another kitchen tool, at least this one has multiple uses and will cause less of a mess for Lexie to clean up.

With this tool set Dara can stop looking through 7 different bags of random tools scattered throughout the garage in hopes of finding something that will kind of work or resorting to a butterknife.

Because sometimes I’m convinced our Swiffer just pretends to clean the floor, this bucket is for real messes

Dara swears by these pans, but we’ve had the same set she bought in her sad condo days and in those many years they’ve gone from non-stick to probably gonna-stick.

Apparently, flowers don’t stay pretty forever… unless you trap then in resin like prehistoric mosquitoes. Help us turn our bouquet into a Jurassic fossil we can keep forever!

Help Lexie retire her signature look of 3 overstuffed reusable grocery bags and a dream. With this foldable duffel, she might finally show up to a trip with just one bag, and maybe even a zipper too.

Dara currently owns two travel bags, one that's small enough to be a purse, and one that's large enough to flee the county. This is our attempt at finding a middle ground, something that's perfect for honeymoon packing, weekend trips, and carrying Lexie's backup shoes. Again.

Dara believes in measuring with her heart. Lexie believes in measuring with actual measurements- especially when it comes to baking! Maybe with these measuring spoons Dara will finally be allowed near cake batter again. Maybe.

We have quite a few oven mitts, but to Dara’s dismay we only have one pair that sort of prevent her hands from burning when taking things out of the oven. Hopefully these Kitchenaid ones will actually be heatproof.

Because Lexie's ginger-turmeric obsession is threatening to bankrupt us one wellness shot at a time. She also wants to work on tricking Dara into eating more of her greens. Help us juice our way to financial stability, and glowing skin.