You get to a point in your life when you give up on a lot of things. I had given up on a lot of things, a lot of people, a lot of people and what they could be to me. I was lost in a lot of ways and I wasn't wanting to look for anything or anyone to pull me out of that. I had always been looking for that without knowing and it never ended well. And then I found her, she found me. And we emailed. I found out her favorite movies, her job, her day to day. And then we started texting and I told her about me, about my love of books and words. Then we met. And our first date lasted 8 hours. From there it moved quickly (as you know the lesbians do) but it felt like forever in the best way Like home had always been where she is, like I had carved out these places inside myself for people before her and now I realized that of course those people hadn't fit - those spaces had been made for her. So for her to be there and so close now only made sense and then there was no way I could look without seeing her, in my home, in my heart, in my future. Everything came together after that. I started to become a version of myself I'd dreamed about but never thought I'd get. The better version you're always chasing and waiting for but never really sure how to get there. Every day I see a better me, a better future, a life with her. And I know she feels the same. I see it in everything she does for me, quells in me, sacrifices for me. And I can't wait to spend forever trying to make her feel just as necessary and needed and worthy of love as she makes me feel every day. To make it to the end of our life and look back and see that every grocery store trip and weekend catching up on laundry and ferrying kids to and from various activities were the best times because we were building our own world, to see joy and love and goodness reflected in the day to day monotony - to know we never lost track of the passion for having a life together we feel now.