FAQs
Question
When should I RSVP by?
Answer
Please RSVP by May 1st to make sure we can get all our ducks in a row for seating and catering.
Question
What time should I arrive at the ceremony?
Answer
The ceremony starts at 3pm. Get there early! Parking may be tight.
Question
Is there parking for the ceremony and reception?
Answer
There is a parking lot at our church's building, but please carpool as much as possible so that we can limit the number of cars that might need to be parked on the street, to care for those who live in the neighborhood.
Question
Are there any other events that I should know about around the wedding?
Answer
Our church has Sunday services at 8:10am and 10:40am. We will attend the second service before we embark on our honeymoon. Come worship Jesus with us!
Question
Are my kids invited?
Answer
If your child(ren) is/are not listed within the RSVP options as you fill out this form or there aren't guest options listed for you, and not being able to bring your child(ren) would inhibit you from attending, please please please let us know. We absolutely want you to come celebrate with us. With space limitations we prioritized inviting the children within our families, church family, and those traveling from a distance. We will absolutely try to figure out a way to make it work if it would prevent you from being able to attend. It also could have simply been an oversight on our part as we were entering all the different names into the system.
Question
How did you two meet? How long have you known each other?
Answer
Caitlin moved to Sioux Falls in the late spring/early summer of 2021 and started attending Connection Church gatherings around then, which I had been attending for about a year. We met sometime that summer at Capriotti's when a group went out to eat following the Sunday worship service. Overtime we gradually got to know each other and became friends as our social circles collided. The first long conversation we had together was while we were at our friend's Turtlenecks & Turntables themed 40th birthday party. That fall Caitlin became a part of the gospel community group I was an apprentice leader in. Then in the fall of 2022 our church launched a gospel community group for youth that I have been leading, and Caitlin has been a faithful member of the core team in caring for the youth from the start. With Sunday services, Wednesday youth gatherings, Friday game nights with friends, and serving and attending various events, it seemed like we saw each other everywhere.
Question
If you saw each other everywhere, did you think it was just a matter of time before you two got together?
Answer
Nope. When we started getting to know each other more in depth through the gospel community group we were both part of, Caitlin was dating someone else at the time. Even when that relationship ended, there wasn't any desire beyond being friends and siblings in Christ, with maybe a thought here or there but never any prolonged interest, until this past fall. Though apparently, if you ask my parents or my manager at Hope Harbor, we had a flirtatious dynamic at Hope Harbor's annual Celebration of Hope and fundraiser event a whole year earlier before we started dating ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Caitlin: It seems like every few months, my mom would ask me, "So... is anything going on between you and Traye? You spend an awful lot of time together...," but looking back, I realize now that God needed me to just spend time drawing deep roots in Him and relearning the purpose of a relationship. I was honestly somewhat surprised to hear that Traye had never thought of me that way, but I'm so thankful that the Lord providentially turned our hearts together at the right time, and it means so much to me to know that he treated me with such honor without any expectations.
Question
When did you start becoming interested in each other then?
Answer
This past October brought about the first time in a while where I had time to even consider dating someone with my schedule. As I mulled and prayed over different possibilities, I realized at the beginning of November I was interested in being more than just Caitlin's friend. We had been talking with one another following our church's Sunday worship gathering when someone came up to me to ask for help with an A/V related question. Because of that, I had to leave the conversation, and I was just so disappointed that I was unable to keep talking with Caitlin. How long had my heart been moving towards her? I have no idea, but it was at that moment I realized my heart had shifted. Little to my knowledge at the time, Caitlin realized she was interested in me a few weeks earlier during a game night I hosted at my parents' house for our church's youth. She had watched me interacting with my niece, which was heart-warming, but she also noticed she was getting envious of a four-almost-five year-old, of all people, for the attention and cuddling my niece was receiving from me. That may be a little weird to share, but it's vulnerable and also super endearing, and I found it absolutely adorable when Caitlin told me about that later on. Still do.
Question
So, you're both interested in each other at the same time, how did you two start dating?
Answer
I overthink A LOT (and that's still a bit of an understatement), analyzing things from every angle I can, and it's not in the nature of my personality to date casually. Even though I was interested in Caitlin, I needed time to think through if she was someone I would want to marry as well as to think through where I was at spiritually, emotionally, financially, etc. to be able to enter into a relationship before I would even consider asking her out on a date. The following week though, after I realized I was interested in Caitlin, she texted me to ask if I would want to go on a walk with her since friends of ours weren't hosting a game night that Friday as they often did. This sped up my slow thinking process a little, and I called her a couple days later on Friday, November 17th to see if she still wanted to go on a walk. I had no idea she was interested in me, and I wasn't at a spot yet in my process to ask her on a date, so I had intended for this to just be some 1:1 time with my friend Caitlin as I often spend with my friends. Caitlin: Side note, those few days waiting to hear back were the WORST. I thought I had ruined everything 😅 Earlier that day one of my sisters had moved a few streets over from me, so I suggested we walk from my house to my sister's house to see how long it would take to walk there, and from there, I suggested we walk to Falls Park since it was the first night of the season the Christmas lights were lighting up the park. As we walked and talked for a couple of hours, what I had intended as an opportunity to spend 1:1 time with my friend Caitlin turned into quite a flirty adventure. But I still wanted more time to think everything through, as is my tendency... A few weeks later, once I was certain though, I called Caitlin on December 8th (still not knowing she was interested in me) and asked if she would like to go on a date with me and get coffee the next day. Caitlin: I said, "I would love that!"
Question
Wait, you've only been dating a few months, and you're already engaged ?!
Answer
Yes! Caitlin and I have known each other for a few years, and Caitlin and I can both get to know people deeply very quickly, which was compounded by how much we already knew each other as well as by the almost magical way our personalities interact with and complement each other (Caitlin: that ENFP/INFJ connection is real, y'all). I have been continually astounded by how God has grown her and continues to grow her through his spirit in her love for Jesus and for his people, from where her life was prior to her move to Sioux Falls, from seeing her navigate repentance with the help of the gospel community we were both part of, to serving alongside her in youth ministry. She grounds me in the good news of Jesus and points me to prayer when I am so apt to be self-reliant, and I have never felt such rest in a friendship for us to be completely ourselves in our strange and peculiar humor, talking through intellectual curiosities, being in awe of the majesty of God and his creation, and so so so much more. A month to the day after asking her out on a date, I told her I loved her on January 8th. Then on February 15th I asked her to marry me. Our timeline may seem like a whirlwind to many. But I wouldn't have it any other way. Caitlin: I have some pretty serious difficulties with commitment (as you might imagine with my history...), but this was literally the easiest decision I've ever made. The most important things I look for in a husband were already evident in his care for our gospel community, and there were plenty of witnesses who testified to his deep commitment to the church and to their own personal growth. The only question I had was whether our personalities could connect and that was immediately apparent from the aforementioned flirtatious Falls Park tower "date-not-date." 😋
Question
How did Traye propose?
Answer
Caitlin has been working half-days on Thursdays, and Thursdays are often my day off. We had plans to get lunch on February 15th, and both beforehand and afterward we walked around downtown Sioux Falls. I didn't want to propose during lunch as I just wanted it to be a moment between the two of us, so the whole time we were walking around and looking at different things, I was trying to find an opportune moment. The moment came when we sat down on some steps that lead down to the river as we watched the ducks on the water (Caitlin: there were about fifty of them, and they were only concerned with our lack of bread crumb offering). Caitlin and I often share music suggestions and make themed playlists for one another, and that whole week I was sending her a playlist, one or two songs each day. I told her we needed to listen to the next song together because of the lyric "while I am here with you" which obviously wouldn't make any sense for her to listen to by herself without me there. The last line of the song though is "Will you marry me?" The song is called "There's a Road" by Soulsician for all those who are curious. When those words were sung, I knelt down by Caitlin and told her just how inadequate words are to express how beautiful she is and how much I love her, that I want to spend the rest of our earthly lives running towards Jesus together and being lights in the darkness, and I pulled out the ring from my pocket and asked her to marry me, to which she replied, "absolutely!" Now, the funny part in the story is that right before we sat down by the river, we had been walking around holding hands and her hand got cold. Not wanting to stop holding hands, she unzipped my coat pocket to put our hands in, but I had to prevent her from doing so since that was where the ring was. She tried a couple more times before she realized what I probably had in my pocket.
Question
When did you know you wanted to get married?
Answer
For me, it was our third date (fourth if you count our walk in November) on December 15th (two months to the day before I proposed). We had dinner with some friends of hers, sang carols and hymns, and heard stories of how God worked in the life of her friends while in the underground church in Ukraine during the rule of the USSR. Following our time at her friend's house we drove around for a couple hours listening to music, talking, and looking at Christmas lights. That night I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life on earth with Caitlin. It was a night filled to the brim with amazing experiences: delicious food, singing praises to Jesus, sharing stories of God's faithfulness, praying, experiencing art and music, laughing together, sitting close to one another, talking about anything and everything. I know life won't always be that way, but I wouldn't want to spend it with anyone other than Caitlin alongside me. I am so excited to spend the rest of our lives pointing to the good news of Jesus and his love for his people through our marriage and love for one another. When we were sinful, treasonous rebels of God, Jesus entered into our broken mess to be like us, to take our darkness upon himself, and to cleanse us and make us righteous so that we could love and enjoy him forever, to be united to him forever. Caitlin: For me, it wasn't until he was leaving to spend a week in Florida. We dedicated the afternoon following our Sunday church gathering to spend quality time together exploring the Palisades. We walked out onto the ice in the middle of the canyon and stood there admiring creation together for hours. I decided that’s what I wanted to do for the rest of my earthly life.
Question
Why June 8th?
Answer
June 8th is six months to the day after I asked Caitlin out on a date, and five months to the day after I told her I loved her. The date seems quite fitting because of that, and it also lines up with our parents' anniversaries; my parents got married on June 6th and hers, on June 7th.