Wedding FAQs

Question

What should I wear to the Gurdwara Sahib (Sikh Temple)?

Answer

Shoes are removed upon entering the Gurdwara Sahib, so if you're feet-shy, wear clean socks. You will be sitting cross-legged on the floor for a length of time, so test out what you are wearing for comfort. A head covering is required inside the Gurdwara Sahib, so you are welcome to bring a large knotted handkerchief (worn over the top of the forehead, knotted behind the head), however the Gurdwara Sahib will provide clean handkerchiefs if you need one. No hats. Most women will usually wear a Chunni, or a long, flowy, transparent scarf that covers their head and shoulders. Masculine Outfit Options: - Long pants, and a dress shirt, and a blazer (optional). - Kurta Pajama (Punjabi Clothing) Feminine Outfit Options: Try to choose bright colors other than white and black, please. - Long pants, loose-fitting long top that covers shoulders - Long or mid-calf length loose dress with full leggings - Salwar Kameez (Punjabi Clothing)

Question

What happens prior to the ceremony?

Answer

The Baraat: Everything begins with the arrival of the Baraat, which is the groom's wedding procession. Andy's friends and family will arrive at the Gurdwara Sahib. Andy will be on a horse while his friends and family dance against the sounds of a Dhol playing, announcing his arrival! He will circle around until they reach the Milni. The Milni: The Milni signifies the meeting of Andy's family and Amy's family. Milni translates to 'a coming together, or joyous meeting'. The two families will meet in front of the entrance of the Gurdwara, and after a short prayer is sung, they will exchange garlands, and Amy's family members will welcome Andy's family with a gift. This symbolizes the union of the two families. Breakfast: All of the guests will enter the Gurdwara Sahib, remove their shoes, and cover their head. They'll wash their hands, and descend downstairs to the Langar Hall (kitchen), where they will enjoy a light breakfast. Breakfast will consist of tea, coffee, samosas, etc.

Question

Entering the Gurdwara Sahib Prayer Hall before the ceremony begins.

Answer

After breakfast, every guest enters the Gurdwara Sahib Prayer Hall , and in a single file line, we walk down the center of the room and wait to bow our head in front of the Guru Granth Sahib (Holy Book) to show respect. You may see Sikhs make an offering of a $1 to the donation box - you are welcome to do so if you like. Your head must be covered upon entering the Gurdwara Sahib Prayer Hall . Women generally sit on the left side of the hall and men sit on the right. It's important not to sit with your feet or your back facing the Holy Book as it is seen as rude. When sitting, you will be in a cross-legged position for the duration of the ceremony. If you are uncomfortable sitting on the floor due to injury or discomfort, there is a bench at the back of the hall you are welcome to use.

Question

The Anand Karaj Wedding Ceremony

Answer

Anand Karaj translates to an act towards happiness. The ceremony begins with the Kirtan, or singing of the Holy Hymns. After several hymns have been sung by the Gyani Ji (Sikh Scholar), the Ardas (prayer) will begin. The Bride's father will place the sash wrapped around the groom's shoulder into his daughter's hands, signifying that he is giving his daughter away. The Laava (wedding vows) will now begin. There are four Laava and each Laav is first read, and then sung which cues the Bride and Groom to rise. Andy and Amy will then walk clockwise around the Guru Granth Sahib (Holy Book). Amy will follow behind Andy still holding the Palla (sash) and together, pacing with the verse until they are back where they started. Andy leading ahead of Amy doesn't imply any superiority - it's meant to demonstrate that Andy's intentions are to care for Amy and support her. Anand Karaj signifies the husband and wife are more than two individuals; they are two who share one soul in two bodies.

Question

The Laava (Wedding Vows)

Answer

Each Laav emphasizes the importance of spirituality in the marriage. Spirituality is the recognition that there exists something greater than ourselves that encompasses where we get our meaning for life, our connection to life, and our desire to be fulfilled. The first Laav directs the couple to let go of the past and embark on a new journey together. It emphasizes that the center of marriage is spiritual, and the success of the marriage rests on a committed and disciplined spiritual practice. The second Laav reminds the couple that it's necessary to let go of ego and fear in order to have a selfless love. The deeper we are able to go into our spiritual mediation, the greater the joy we will receive. The third Laav encourages the couple to see light in everyone, and to live in love, live in happiness, and among kind people. The fourth and final Laav signifies the final stage of peace, harmony, and balance where human love blends with the love of God, or spirit, or the Universe.

Question

What happens after the Laava are completed?

Answer

The Anand Sahib Hymn is sung, which signifies the Anand, or eternal bliss that one has attained from a spiritual union with God. Ardaas (closing prayer) will take place where the entire congregation will stand and place their hands together in prayer, seeking blessings for the couple and for the good of all mankind. Gurvaak - Following the Ardaas, a random page of the Guru Granth Sahib is opened to provide a message and guidance for the day. Parshad will be served.

Question

Parshad Etiquette

Answer

After the Ardaas (closing prayer), a Sewadar (volunteer) will go around and give everyone a napkin, after which you will then be offered Parshad as a gift. Parshad is a sweet flour and ghee (clarified butter) based food. When the Parshad is offered, you want to cup both hands together to receive it, and you can use your napkin if you're not comfortable using your bare hands. If for any reason you are unsure or cannot eat it, it's best to ask for a very small portion, and then either pass it to a friend who may want it instead! But I can tell you, it's delicious! This will mark the closing of the spiritual service and wedding ceremony!

Question

What happens after the Ceremony is over?

Answer

Langar (lunch) is served in the community kitchen on the first floor. This is where breakfast was served before the ceremony began. Langar is a vegetarian meal served after every service and stands for the principle of equality between all people of the world regardless of religion, caste, color, age, gender, or social status. Everyone sits together and eats the same meal. This also signifies the ethics of sharing, community, and oneness of all humans.

Question

Additional References

Answer

If you have any questions or concerns, please let the Bride know! https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Attending_a_Sikh_Wedding https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Visiting_a_Gurdwara https://www.sikhiwiki.org/index.php/Laava