Our Story
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Nicole's Side of the Story
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Part 1: Luke coming into my life
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My story with Luke begins in 2017 at Christian Challenge, an on-campus college ministry at USC. I do not remember Luke much, other than that it was the year the Navigators (another USC college ministry) joined Christian Challenge. I began to spend more time with Luke around the summer of 2018. We were in the summer training program, Project Impact, offered by Christian Challenge to students in the Los Angeles area during their summer break. When Luke graduated in 2019, he joined CIV, a church many USC Christian Challenge alums joined. I had been a part of CIV since 2015 or 2016, but became a regular attender in 2017. What I remember about Luke when he joined our church in 2019 was the weekly playtime he had with the kids. He created a game called "Chase Luke," in which he would run around the church while several kids chased him. It was when I saw him being chased by those kids and having such a good time that I gave him a second look and thought, "Oh, he is cute!" From 2019 to 2024, Luke and I grew as friends, and I started to develop feelings for him. Over those years, the feelings came and went, and I would ask God many (MANY MANY) times to put my name on Luke's heart (hey, it had worked for other people I knew, so my mindset was, why not ask?). Also during those years, I discovered that Luke's desire was to remain single; he enjoyed his relationship with Jesus so much that he did not see the need for a romantic one… a beautiful yet challenging revelation. Between 2021 and 2023, I reached out to friends (both guys and girls) to ask about Luke and his desire to be single, to see if he had ever changed his mind. But I would get the same answer that he still wants to and enjoys being single.
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Part 2: The phrase
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I tried online dating to no avail, and I kept asking God for a man from our church to ask me out! I even went to a couple of single Christian dating mixers, but nothing panned out from those events other than a first date. Over so many years, I cried out to God with my desire for a relationship and marriage, but God would give me a "no". On February 8, 2025, I attended one of those mixers. I had my eye on a few guys, but none of them approached me after the event. I remember, though, that as I left the event, I felt a peace: "I will be ok." On February 9, Super Bowl Sunday, I was invited to a couple of parties by people at CIV, and one of those parties was at Luke's house. Naturally, I chose to go to Luke's because YES to a party at the cute boy's house! Throughout the party, Luke and I interacted like we always do, and when it was over, I went to put on my shoes. "Oh, you are leaving?" Luke said as I put on my shoes, "Yeah, thank you for having me over!" Then Luke said, "I will walk you to your car" Luke is a no games man, he does not lead a girl on, so when he told me that in my head I said, "HE IS GOING TO ASK ME OUT!" As we walked to my car we chatted a little then Luke told me, "you love Jesus, you love people and you serve well. I want to ask you out on a date" I spun around in disbelief! (I literally spun in a circle) I could not believe it!!! LUKE STEVENS ASKED ME OUT!!! On the drive home, I was talking about it to Jesus like I would one of my female friends, with a LOT of "AHHHHHH NO WAY NO WAY!!" Luke and I went on three dates; at the end of the third date, he said for our next one he wanted to talk about if becoming boyfriend and girlfriend made sense.
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Part 3: Dating!
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We then became official on our fourth date (still one of my favorite dates!!) and dated for nine months. We would get food, hike, walk through random neighborhoods, go on double dates, watch movies, make dinner, and spend time with each other's families. When Luke and I would be together, it felt like being with an old friend, comfortable and familiar and fun. Around our six month-aversary we talked about a timeline. By the end of the year, let's determine if engagement made sense. Throughout those nine months, I had to give my hopes of becoming Luke's wife to God many, many, MANY times! In October, Luke and I took a walk around the neighborhood where we do community group, and he asked about going ring shopping ("if we are thinking about engagement, I would need to acquire certain hardware")!!! But I still had the thought: "You never know, God may choose to end it."
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Part 4: November 22nd
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Around this time, my roomies asked what I wanted to do for my 30th birthday in November, and I decided on a road trip to Monterey to visit the aquarium. We went up on November 20 and planned to be there until Saturday. Tiana knew the area and was also texting her sister for recommendations throughout the trip. One of the things we wanted to do for this trip was finally get a nice roomie photo together to frame in our house, so I told Tiana and McKenzie we should dress up for it. Tiana's sister gave us a beautiful recommendation for a woodsy trail where we could take our photos. When we arrived and parked, a ranger approached our car and said we could not park because the lot was reserved. He said it was reserved from 12 to 5pm, but no one had shown up yet, and I thought, "How strange! It feels like people are getting later to things," and we re-parked. We then walked to a trailhead, and I saw it was blocked off. Being the rule follower that I am, this made me uncomfortable, but Tiana noted, "Oh, it only says no bikers," which made me feel better. As we walked onto the trail, Tiana said it would be better to go farther into the forest to create the illusion of a deep forest. As we continued walking, I noticed my roomies had stopped. I felt a stillness in the air and turned to look at them. I then turned and saw Luke, in a suit, no glasses, and I thought, "What is he doing here? This is a roomie trip"…when it clicked in my head that he was going to propose, I began to scream out "WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT!!!" and was sobbing! Luke had set up blankets to stand on and printed photos from our dates that hung on twine in the trees. As he was talking to me, I blacked out, all I remember is "these past nine months", "Nicole Jessica Siryj", and then seeing him start to go down on one knee, and then me sticking my left hand out for the ring! The man I had been praying over for YEARS asked me to become his wife!!!
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Luke's Side of the Story
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Part 1: What took me so long?
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Nicole and I are thrilled to commit to put each other first for the rest of our days. We are also head-over-heels in love with each other! So when I share with people that we were friends for seven years before we dated, this is the question I often get, and a question I have often asked myself! The short answer is that God’s timing is MUCH better than ours, and that neither of us would change it for the world. Now for the long answer. Nicole and I met at some point after the fall of 2017, but my earliest memories of Nicole specifically was around 2019 at a party that she organized on the USC campus. There, she vulnerably shared her story with us about how God had given her victory over past mistakes. It was so encouraging and impressive to me that she was so bold and open to give glory to God in this way without any reservations! It was around this time that we became friends. Meanwhile, as I graduated in May 2019, I was learning what it really meant to relate with Jesus as my closest friend, inviting Him into all parts of my day. Colors got brighter. My walking pace slowed. The wind, the birds, the sunset all proclaimed His name. It was such a strong wellspring of joy that I couldn’t imagine anything I could want that was better than HIM. Jesus was my closest friend. The idea of dating crossed my mind from time to time, but I just couldn’t imagine how it could get any better than this. My joy was so great that I suspected that God was perhaps calling me to lifelong singleness. This was my preference for years, though I never did get a clear calling from God in this regard. I was self-aware enough to know that my inclination to stay single could change if the right girl came along. But with all this overflowing joy, I increasingly felt like it would take God hitting me over the head with a 2x4 to change my mind. I had no idea what that would ultimately mean…
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Part 2: Things change
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May 2023 through March 2024 was the hardest year of my life up to that point. It just felt like one blow after another. It felt like God was very far, even though I knew He was near. Yet, through it all, my friends and family were there to support me. Slowly, I began to feel God’s presence again. Of course, he never left, but His FELT presence had returned! That dark year taught me many valuable lessons, but one of them was that I NEEDED my friends to grow closer with God. I knew this to be true before, but now it was real. I reached the end of myself, and found nothing… except that I was loved by Jesus, and that was all that really mattered. And this time, what opened the door for God’s grace to flood my heart was the loving encouragement of my friends. It was during that year when my opinion about staying single fundamentally changed. I had no regrets about my time being single; it was all the more time for joy-filled fellowship with God! But I saw firsthand how much I deeply needed my friends to help me get up again and spur me on. And it was now obvious to me how helpful a life partner would be to point me towards, rather than distract me from, a stronger relationship with the One who I desired most: Jesus. I knew it wasn’t yet the right time for me to date. I wanted to make sure that I was dating for the right reasons: out of an abundance of joy in Christ, and not to fill up the hole in my soul that is meant only for Him. And I had too much going on emotionally to handle dating someone anyways. But by March 2024, it was clear to me that God had changed my perspective, and it was time for me to consider dating someone. The only question was who and when…
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Part 3: Prayers Asked
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A prayer that I had been praying since 2019 now increasingly found itself on my lips. It went something like this: Jesus, You are all that I want. You are all that I need. You are all that I’ve got. I never want anything to change that. Period. If staying single for life is the best way for me to taste Your goodness, that is what I want. But if getting married is the best way for me to grow closer with You, then I pray that you would put the name of a girl on my heart whom you want me to date. And I pray that you would make it obvious to me, literally sweeping me off my feet if you have to! And in the meantime, I pray that you would grow her in maturity and patience. I pray that she would fall in love with You more than any guy. I didn’t know it at the time, but all those years I was praying that, God was answering. Day after day, year after year, He was growing Nicole into the woman she was meant to be. She grew in joy as Jesus became more dear to her than a guy ever could. She patiently waited for God to answer her prayers for a husband. Many times she prayed for God to put her name on my heart. And eight years after we first met, He did!
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Part 4: Prayers Answered
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By the beginning of 2025, I was feeling like my frustrated prayers were being met with deaf ears. But Jesus stood by me, taught me to surrender my frustrations to Him, and He answered me! I invited Jesus into my mess, and out of the mess came clarity. By late January it was clear that God had put Nicole Siryj on my heart. When I talked to my friends about wanting to ask her out, they were thrilled! Some of our friends from Church in the Valley may be surprised to know that a conspicuous incident at a certain church members meeting that month had nothing to do with me asking her out a week later :) After the fateful Super Bowl Party, she said yes! For weeks, my whole life felt like it was saturated by joy and peace. The funny thing was that the joy wasn’t centered around Nicole. It was centered around Jesus. He met me in my frustration. He cared about what I cared about. And He was faithful to answer my prayers. What a good God! I couldn’t wait to follow Him into this new and exciting relationship with Nicole, who turned out to be even more amazing than I thought she was! She was beautiful inside and out. She liked to walk and talk. She loved nature and Lord of the Rings. She was a hard worker and had a heart for people. She had learned to trust God with her greatest earthly desire, marriage. But my favorite thing about her by far was that Jesus really was her closest friend and confidant. He was the first one she turned to when nervous, excited, afraid, joyful, or sad. He was the one she first celebrated with when I asked her out. He was her greatest joy. At the end of the day, everything good and beautiful about her flowed from the simple fact that she really was abiding in Jesus every day. All of these things I had noticed from a distance as friends. But on those dates, as we consistently talked for hours longer than we had planned, I saw it all up close. She was amazing, and I couldn’t wait to go on more dates with her. Fortunately, she was on board too!
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Part 5: The rest is history
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I could go on about how we started to number our dates (we got to D35 before I proposed!), the time we first held hands on the Strand, and how we walked with each other through a few big life decisions. But what I want to share now is a list which I started in 2017 and edited since then: a list of qualities I wanted in a future wife. No one except Jesus could perfectly exemplify all of these traits, and it is also a list of qualities I need to grow in myself! But I am delighted to marry someone who is growing in all of these areas, as I seek to do the same. The more I have reflected on this list, the more I have realized it was describing Nicole all along. As I spend more time with her, I become more like Jesus than I would have been otherwise. She increasingly rests in her identity as a beloved daughter of God. She increasingly takes initiative to make her home with Jesus daily. She is attractive and enjoyable to be around. She is growing more teachable. She is growing more faithful and is learning to always do the right thing without fear. She is learning to respond to trials by clinging to Jesus. She is growing strong relationships with mentors, close friends, and people she can help grow. She increasingly puts the needs of others above her own. She increasingly cares for the peoples of the world who don’t yet know Jesus. She increasingly respects me for who I am. Our personal, vocational, relational, spiritual, emotional, financial, and familial lives are increasingly compatible. She is naturally stronger in areas I am naturally weaker. Nicole is not perfect, and neither am I. We have many storms ahead, dry seasons, and times when loving each other will require an intentional choice in the absence of feeling. But by God’s grace, this is who Nicole is. This is who she is becoming every day as we make our home with Jesus, together. And I can’t wait to stand next to her in Heaven as I look at the beautiful woman God has grown her to be. The rest is history!
