We technically met in the spring of 2016 when we both attended a brunch in Chicago with our mutual Minnesotan friends. However, the extent of our conversation was exchanging greetings from opposite ends of the table, so I don’t think this counts as “How I met her”. The following winter I was invited to a going-away party for my roommate from college’s future wife, who was moving from Chicago to Denver to move in with him. The party was at a Chinese Karaoke bar called U Rice. For those of you not familiar with the Chicago karaoke scene, U Rice was the sister restaurant of Lan’s. Lan’s is a well-known Chinese karaoke bar in Chicago with a reputation for getting wild. Needless to say, I was quite excited about this party, especially because they would be serving all-you-can-eat Chinese food. The party was a blast. Everyone was having a great time. The owner of Lan’s showed up, wasted, and started licking people’s faces, which was weird; this was pre-covid though so everyone just rolled with it. I guess it’s not surprising he got arrested a couple of years later for harassment. Tim and Steph sang Closer by the Chainsmokers, which, to this day, is the best karaoke version I’ve ever heard of the song. I guess they were practicing the duet for weeks beforehand…sort of lame…but I respect the commitment.

I was about 10 crab rangoons deep and feeling great. Nothing pairs better with a vodka Redbull than fried cream cheese and imitation crab meat. I noticed a beautiful girl at the party who I had said hi to at brunch 6 months earlier and went over to talk to her. We hit it off immediately. I was in medical school at the time so I charmed her with conversation about biochemistry and physiology, I was quite smooth. We got along well and at some point in the night I asked her for her number, how about dem apples. I couldn’t remember her name so, in an attempt to not reveal to her that I didn’t know her name, I asked her how to spell it when typing it into my phone; this failed miserably because her name, obviously, is Sarah. To save face I reassured her that I do, in fact, know how to read and write. I realized that she likely didn’t know my name, and since I had already dug myself into a hole, I asked her if she knew what my name was. She didn’t so I prompted her to guess. I gave her a hint that it started with the letter H. Here is where things get interesting. There are a lot of common names that start with H, Henry, Harry, Harrison, and Howard to name a few. However, without really thinking Sarah just blurts out Hagrid. Now I know I have quite a hairy back, but Hagrid…I mean come on. Even more perplexing is the fact that I would assume most people, if they were going to guess an H name from the Harry Potter books, would guess Harry. But Hagrid it was, and it stuck. Now Hagrid is her nickname for me, and it’s really cute. I’m just kidding. The rest of the night is a bit of a blur. I remember heading to a late-night bar, and trying to convince Sarah to come with, but I was unsuccessful. We ended up going on our first date a couple of weeks later and the rest is history. Who would’ve thought going into that party that I would end up with crab rangoons and a wife, what a great party!

I was at a going-away party for my high-school friend, Bo. Bo was moving to Denver to attend law school and live with her now-husband, Trevor. The evening was full of off-pitch karaoke, non-authentic Chinese food, and … the beginning of a beautiful romance! During the party, I kept bumping into this big, strong guy who I recognized as being one of Trevor's friends but didn't really know. This guy was making me laugh all night. I don't really remember what he was saying exactly, but I do remember it was ridiculous! Since he was so funny, I told him I was a stand-up comedian even though I had never done stand-up comedy in my life. Obviously, he was impressed and immediately started gushing over me. At the end of the night, I called him Hagrid, we exchanged numbers, and went our separate ways. We texted all night — where the ridiculousness continued — and every text I'd screenshot and share with Bo, lol. The next day, Bo told me Hagrid's name is actually Hayden and he is a really good guy. Thank goodness I took her word for it! We went on our first date a few weeks later and like instantly fell in love.