FAQs

Question

Is this a "real" wedding?

Answer

Short Answer: Absolutely :) Long Answer: Of course it's a real wedding -- we are both making a lifelong promise to each other. That sounds about right when you think of the meaning of marriage, yeah?

Question

Which one of us is the bride?

Answer

Short answer: We both are :) Long answer: If it's a same-sex wedding, you'll see two brides or two grooms. If it's an opposite-sex wedding, you'll see one of each. Don't get caught up in your traditional vision of a wedding, besides- if you project traditional gender norms onto ANY same-sex couple you essentially telling them that you are uncomfortable with them as they are, and let's be real- you know that you love us.

Question

Do the women have to wear suits and the men have to wear dresses?

Answer

Short Answer: Um, no. Long Answer: Just...still, no.

Question

Can I call this a gay wedding?

Answer

Short Answer: Nope. It's just a wedding :) Long Answer: Even though you very well may be excited, and we are SO glad that you are, absurdly gay-positive comments like this can be a tad bit offensive.

Question

Which one of us will walk down the aisle?

Answer

Short Answer: Both of us :) Long Answer: Again, forget about the traditional male-female roles you're used to seeing at a wedding. Every couple (gay or straight) is different. Some walk down the aisle with a family member; some walk down the aisle together. And in our case, we will each be walking down the aisle with our dads, separately.

Question

Where can I find gender appropriate gifts and cards?

Answer

Short Answer: Etsy! Long Answer: We appreciate the acknowledgment that it'll probably be a bit difficult to find a female same-sex wedding card at your local store. And if you do, we can almost guarantee that the two brides will both have long hair and will be wearing dresses :p That being said, any specialty online shop such as Etsy, Dazzle, and The Knot have great LGBTQ+ friendly sections and tips.

Question

What kind of traditions should I expect to see at your wedding?

Answer

Short Answer: A few we're keeping traditional, and a few we aren't. Long Answer: Come and see for yourself :) We have decided to go with a few different traditions that have stood the test of time, walking down the aisle with our dads, having a first dance, boutonnieres and ties etc etc. Don't expect either bride to toss a bouquet over their head, or the removal of a garter from one of the brides (I don't think we'll even be wearing them ? lol), and hey maybe we'll do pie instead of cake!!

Question

What else should I avoid asking or saying that might be offensive?

Answer

Which one is the wife and which one is the husband? To the parents of the brides- How do you feel about all this and gay marriage? I love gay people! How do you plan to have kids? Do you watch Glee?

Question

My god what CAN I say at this wedding??

Answer

Anything, just don't be a weeny! Haha, tell us.... We look beautiful Jenelle, your suit is on POINT (because it sure as hell will be) GST (Gay standard time), yes it's a thing And anything else, and be prepared- if accidental slips are made, people just might giggle about it.

Question

Will I have fun at this wedding that sounds complicated and PC and annoying?

Answer

Short Answer: Hell yes. Long Answer: At the end of the day it's a wedding, and we want you all to have a BLAST. Dance, laugh, eat good food, love your brides and just have a good time. LGBTQ+ or not, we're family and we're gonna phhhhhhhharty.