Best Man (UK)
Met 24 years or 24,000 Fifa matches ago. He puts the bro in bromance. The Gera to my Zamora. The other half of Casa Lidl. Also known as Uncle Kev, Kevin, Shane, Doyle. Rarely wears sleeves.
Matron of Honor
The classic sister dynamic. Idolized her growing up, then hated her, now we're besties. Favorite memories include all family vacations. She lets me be the fun aunt. Strangely fond of a vacuum cleaner.
Best Man (US)
First met in Year 9 Biology. Mutual fans of osmosis. Bonded over my Wrexham career on Football Manager and his unexpected pace on sports day. Looks scary, but isn't. Unlikely ramen connoisseur.
Bridesmaid
Coheart, friend, then moved in with my parents. They call her Iowa Katie. Vern's biggest fan. You can find us at Sandbar or the Sunshine Shack. Has made British terms her own. Brilliant, happy bunny, cheers.
Usher
Shared niche sporting success by winning the BUCS Gaelic Football Championship. Later shared sporting mediocrity with Arborfield FC. A real terrific bloke, for me. Worth asking about Gareth Bale's parents.
Bridesmaid
Introduced herself with "homemade" pumpkin bread. Spoiler alert, it was from a box. Nearly died together hiking an active volcano in Guatemala. Most likely to become or marry an astronaut.
Usher
Met at school but it took my incredibly average cricket skills to solidify our friendship. We co-starred on Russian TV at the 2018 World Cup. If you've ever been to Infernos in Clapham, you probably know him. Very good at Talbot ball.
Bridesmaid
Mom was thrilled I went to college in Arkansas and came back with a best friend named Bailey. We lived together for 6 years and took a 2200 mile road trip. Still on speaking terms. Hoping to meet Harry Styles in England.
Usher
First met playing football for Wokingham Town Under 7s. Grew closer after discovering a shared passion for Soul Cal by Tree 8. Incredible non-league knowledge. Doesn't like birds.
Bridesmaid
How to sum up Kelly in 200 characters... Racked up a lot of flights together, not always ending up where we intended. Doesn't believe in worries. Treats Timone and Pumba like a life coach.