Wedding Party
Kristin Hoover
Matron of Honor
To Kristin, our matron of honor today, A friend so close, in every way. In med school's whirlwind, we both did meet, Roommates and friends, a bond so sweet. Cooking together, our pots and pans clanged, Silliness in study sessions, laughter often rang. Kristin, the best confidante, always there to share, In life's adventures, you've always been there. As our matron of honor, you stand by our side, With memories of med school, in our hearts, you reside. A cherished friend, through thick and thin, On this special day, let the celebrations begin.
Ryan Cunningham
Best Man
He’s my pal. He’s my home-boy, my rotten soldier. He’s my sweet cheese, my good-time boyeh. After abandoning his love of the kazoo, he settled for the next best thing; electric guitar. We formed a band in 1981 that would become one of the biggest acts in rock history. We toured the world and lived life to the fullest, but eventually we couldn't stand each other and broke up the band, which remained fractured until we finally reunited in 2018. Wait, actually, that was Motley Crue. We're still great friends and like to nerd out on stuff like Magic the Gathering and Dungeons & Dragons. Ryan also does a crack-on impression of the lisping old man from Family Guy, and loves to do it for anyone who asks. I couldn't be more thrilled to have him on board.
Michael Ray Garcia
Man of Honor
Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to Michael. Michael is not just any friend; he's the culinary genius who can whip up a gourmet meal out of leftovers and a can of beans. If you've ever been lucky enough to taste his cooking, you know what I'm talking about! But it's not just his culinary skills that make Michael so special. He's also incredibly loyal. When the going gets tough, you can always count on him to have your back. He's the kind of friend who'll drop everything to help you out. Now, I have to admit, Michael can be a bit of a bad influence sometimes, but in the best possible way. He's the guy who convinces you to have just one more drink at the party and turns an ordinary night into an unforgettable adventure.
Dan Ireland
Groomsman
Dan is my oldest friend; physically, mentally, and spiritually. While he does tend to get over-emotional from time to time, it's never been enough to ruin 25 years of friendship. This old gray fox is the first member of my best-friend triumvirate consisting of Dan, Ryan, and Steve. Dan is the ace in the hole you call up when you need to show the kids you can still hang in first person shooters, and has been hard-carrying me for well over two decades now. At this point in life, he's basically family and I wouldn't have anyone else at my side while we get schwifty on September 14th.
Moraa Onsando
Bridesmaid
Ladies and gentlemen, let's cheer for Moraa, the fantastic bridesmaid I met in Grenada! She's a loyal friend, a laugh-inducing genius, and we even embarked on a wild adventure to Puerto Rico together! Moraa's loyalty is unwavering, and her humor is infectious. She's the friend you can count on for both a shoulder to vent on and a hearty laugh. As former roommates, we've shared countless hilarious moments, and our bond has grown stronger with each one. And when the music starts, Moraa's dance moves light up the room. Our Puerto Rico escapade was just one of many unforgettable adventures with her. So, let's raise a toast to Moraa, the incredible bridesmaid who adds a spark of joy to every moment. Get ready to celebrate, laugh, and dance the night away with this amazing friend by our side!
Mark McNutt
Groomsman
Mark is my brother from the same mother. The only guy who gets all the dumb references from when we were kids and the only person who can stand living with me outside of Aggi. He's always up for mischief, mayhem, and the odd bit of tom-foolery. He's all about havin' fun. You know, get a couple cocktails in him, start a fire in someone's kitchen, maybe go to Sea World and take his pants off. He's famous for his signature catchphrase, 'Kablammy!' and you can always find him doing magic and pulling cards out of your nose. We've literally been through it all together, so of course he'll be there with me for this.
Sarah Roscher
Bridesmaid
Meet Sarah, our lively and spirited friend hailing from the City of Brotherly Love, Philadelphia! She's a dog enthusiast, a dance floor diva, and the savior of my off-key singing moments. Our friendship began with a bit of drama, as I valiantly attempted to rescue her from what was probably a non-existent railing disaster. But it was the start of a beautiful journey filled with laughter and unforgettable memories. Sarah and I share a love for dressing up and hitting the dance floor, where she effortlessly shines with her moves and keeps me in tune (literally!) when my singing ventures off-key, which, let's face it, is pretty much always. So, get ready to meet Sarah, the life of the party, the dog lover, and the guardian of my musical aspirations. Together, we're a dynamic duo ready to take on any dance floor, and we can't wait to celebrate with you!
McThanael McNutt
Groomsman
McThaniel is the only person on this list who got their name from a child with a speech impediment. To be fair, Nathaniel has too many syllables, but maybe that contributed to him being the perfect child, back in the day. While also having the honor of being my younger sibling, he honors himself by being an excellent goblin/artist hybrid. If you have any questions like, what do goblins eat, where are they from, what do goblins want, and why are goblins? - feel free to ask him. While the wedding is exciting, it's also important to remember that it's a bigger day for McThaniel than for us, so make sure you congratulate him when you see him.
Joanna Fabris
Bridesmaid
Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to meet Joanna, our delightful bridesmaid all the way from Canada! She's not just a friend; she's a former roommate and the queen of silly moments. Joanna and I have shared some truly hilarious times together. Picture this: our legs up in the air, lounging on the couch, watching movies like gravity-defying champions. It's our special movie-watching technique, I promise! But our adventures didn't stop there. We've had our fair share of early 4 am mornings, stumbling our way to the kitchen, half-asleep but determined to whip up a decent breakfast, while eggs are falling to the floor. So, here's to Joanna, our Canadian connection and the partner in crime for all things fun and silly. Get ready for some more silly and unforgettable moments as we celebrate together!
Chris Marasti-Georg
Groomsman
Chris, or CMG as he's known to some, is an important member of the gang. If you read the story of Motley Crue under Ryan's blurb, just remember that he was our Mick Mars - sans the debilitating disease. Chris is the guy you invite to everything; your cousins bounce-house birthday party, your favorite bistro, the get together with friends of friends where you don't really want to go because you're not sure you'll have a good time. Even standing in line at the DMV if you're feeling sadistic. He's here for a good time and a long time and he makes times better just by showing up. Also, make sure to find him at the wedding if you're in need of a killer restaurant or business name.
Dan Foster
Officiant
Allow me to introduce Dan, our incredible officiant and unofficial bridesman, originally from Chicago and now proudly calling Pittsburgh home. He's more than a friend; he's the one who knows how to make any day better and always up for an adventure. Dan is the ultimate companion when you need to unwind after a tough day or seek a thrill on an exciting journey. He's the friend who can chill with you, ease your worries, and turn a bad day into a good one with his unwavering support and great sense of humor. With his warm heart, knack for turning ordinary moments into extraordinary ones, and adventurous spirit, Dan is the perfect choice to officiate our special day. Get ready to witness the union of two hearts, with Dan leading the way as our beloved officiant and unofficial bridesman.