You may have received your save the date and it looks like a postcard inviting you to a revolution. You're close. We're actually gearing up to enter into the battle of our lives. Against each other, forever. Although the veteran-married couples among our guests may know and, as I've come to learn in the 9+ years we've been together, it's not a battle I'll ever win. Whether its the covers and bed space, dinner for the night, "what do you want to watch?", how we're spending our Sunday... I'm sure I'm on the losing side. Alright. Really, it's because Malaina and I met years ago, and one of the bigger first functions we spent together was 4th of July, with her family. Splitting the day between being out on the lake, anchoring her dad's boat next to her Uncle John's, and then having a barbecue that night at her Uncle Tom's on the corner of Arkansas Ave at Lakeside Ave. If I'm honest, it was that night when I said to myself, "I gotta get myself in this family!" It's been the endgame ever since. This unintentionally has made the 4th of July a very important holiday to us, so we've always celebrated it a little extra. Whether its matching crazy outfits, some change to my facial hair, or for one year, a stars and stripes haircut, we've always taken the Nation's birthdate pretty seriously. So when it came time to do our engagement photos, we figured we'd have a bit of fun with the theme and go patriotic.

Sounds like the opening to a cheesy novel. Which I guess isn't all bad, if the things you're writing sound like they can be coming from some cheapo romance novel. But I know why you guys are here: you want the good stuff. You wanna know all those little details that add up to "I Do." Malaina and I met because of the Carters. Not Jimmy Carter, the 39th President of the US. Not Vince Carter either, NBA star, or Helena Bonham Carter, that weird actress in movies made by (and wife of) Tim Burton. No no, we met because Kaylee and Jamie Carter. I am friends with Jamie from school, and Kaylee is Malaina's best friend, and if you haven't guessed it already, they're sisters. Eventually we crossed paths enough for 'sparks to fly' as they say, or whatever you'd call bonding over watching Brüno together in a small group of friends. I should've known anything to come out of watching that weird movie together would result in a wild ride, but it's been a lot of fun. And I don't want that fun to end. We started dating on July 30, 2010. Not one month later, I (Vinnie, not Malaina) put the pedal down and moved to Columbus hoping to put this weirdness in the rearview mirror before I found myself in a relationship. It didn't work. Malaina followed me down there in April 2012 after visiting almost every other weekend, and we moved back in December 2013. Both of us decided that, while Columbus is a phenomenal city with plenty of potential for opportunities and growth, it was away from friends and family. Friends that helped us meet and family that supported us from afar. And Cleveland is better.

Now, changing your life and then changing your life AGAIN drastically for your romantic partner should be enough, but I wasn't satisfied enough to pull that trigger and get that ring. Oh no, no no no. Naturally, just for fun and as a test for us we moved in with my parents for about a year until we established ourselves back home. Plus I had to get mom and dad's approval. It was during that time that I went for my CDL license and Malaina started going to school for what would eventually become a degree in Graphic Design. And for Christmas 2014 my dad gave us an eviction notice. We moved to Elyria. I still wasn't sure, after all the hassle I put this girl through, on whether or not we could do this thing on a permanent basis. Once more, I put the pedal down as a last ditch effort to break free and began drivin' truck over the road. Let me tell you, I should've seen the signs then. Well yes the exit signs on the highway because I missed my fair share of those, but I mean the signs of missin' my baby as a hard drivin' man. My thumb callused from refreshing Malaina's facebook page for updates or scrolling the photos on my phone at night while waiting for that morning delivery appointment to come. We had to change phone carriers because Sprint couldn't handle the call volume. I started to relate to country songs. It took a year, but in July 2015 I got off the road and started the job I have now. I think at this point, it was Malaina's turn to do the testing. The first couple months I was off the road I could see those wheels spinnin', both the ones in her head and the ones on her car getting the hell outta there. We made it though. Things went well. We moved out to the country (south Amherst) and discovered we're backyard people (see: hillbillies).

Unfortunately though, in March 2016, Malaina's Uncle Mike passed away suddenly. Mike was a great guy, and Eric's (Malaina's dad) neighbor too. Eric and Mike were best friends, who would scuba dive together and sometimes with their other brothers, John and Tom. As a result of growing up around that much water and boating, Malaina became a scuba diver herself, going so far as to work at the only scuba store for miles in this area, Underwater Dive Center. Of course she would go diving with them when she could. We would spend time with Mike at dinners and other events, concerts on the river, or for some of my fondest memories during the Dinghy Poker run on Black River in the summers. We are fortunate enough to have inherited his boat, our little inflatable dinghy named Just Add Water. Tragically, just as things were beginning to return to a normal state, we lost Eric in April 2017 in a motorcycle accident. This was a devastating blow to both of us, and even harder on Malaina who was still grieving her Uncle and diving partner. I didn't know Eric was my friend until after I lost him. I knew I loved him and I knew I could spend time with him even when Malaina wasn't around, and often I did. I didn't know we were friends though until I realized I missed his company. We fostered Eric's dogs (Sam and Ginger) for some time while her step mom healed, and still have Ginger to this day. I think that those dogs helped more than anything I could have done. As hard as it was though, I'll never pretend to know what Malaina has gone through in her healing process.

That's when I knew I was making a mistake by not already being married to this woman. Through all the storms we faced, between long distance at first, limping through getting back on our feet coming home to the Cleveland area, working over the road, and losing both her uncle and her dad (and diving partners,) I witnessed a woman standing strong and true. Wave after wave, and storm after storm just like that lighthouse we're going to get married on, Malaina's light was always shining. It's a stunning thing, endearing really, to see that kind of unwavering strength. I knew then it was time to finally put the pedal down, this time the right direction, and commit my life to trying my best to stand next to this woman through all of our storms, together.

So now of course comes the good stuff, the proposal. I decided to find a date that Malaina would be least suspect of. I mean after all, we'd been together for 8 years by the time I finally woke up and realized I was being dumb for letting this relationship idle. How could she not think it was coming at some point? I chose the weekend of St. Patrick's day. When you think of St. Pat's, surely you don't think of drunken blabbering at 12 in the afternoon in a dark pub, you think: marriage. It's perfect, right? I spent that Friday preparing for an at-home proposal. I laid out rose petals coming through our back door, leading her on a scavenger hunt per se, traveling through our home finding note cards hanging from the ceiling. "WOULD" "YOU" "BE" "MY" they led to the bedroom, where another note was on the bed. "DATE TO THE MELTING POT TONIGHT...", I wrote, hoping to psych her out. "I wanted to use more rose petals, but I ran out in the office..." I said. I left another note in there: "...AND ACCOMPANY ME ON EVERY OTHER DATE... FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES TOGETHER?" Boom. She turned around, I'm on my knee, she's crying. I proposed March 16, 2018. She said no though. Just kidding. The next day I had already organized a big party with friends and family at our house both celebrating St. Patrick's day and our engagement, and only Malaina was unaware it was a dual-purpose party. If you ask me, I think its a perfect plan to make sure I've always got an excuse to celebrate St. Patrick's day.

If you've made it through the novel above: Congratulations! As I had mentioned before, Malaina comes from a big boating family. Celebrating our marriage that close to the lake and the river that can be credited for a lot of memories that our relationship is founded on is ideal to us. Beyond that, we are big Rockin' on the River concert-goers, which is a summer series of concerts held at Black River Landing. There isn't a better way to symbolize our relationship than those concerts: outdoors, good music, surrounded by good people, some friends, some family, nothing too prestigious and pretty laid back right there on the water. This is the feeling we want to convey with everyone coming to celebrate our marriage with us. Lastly, Malaina's dad would dock his boat down at the marina on the river, visible from the landing. The location means a lot to us, along with being in Lorain, where we both grew up. The ceremony itself will be held on the lighthouse, early in the day and unfortunately due to capacity issues, only open to close family. We chose to incorporate the lighthouse only after one of my best friends and groomsman Tony Berki suggested it in jest. If ever there's a church for us to use though, nothing could work better than the Lorain Lighthouse. So please do not feel upset for missing the ceremony and thank you for understanding why we chose not to go through a traditional [catholic] ceremony, but we can promise there will be plenty of party left in us when the reception starts.