I (Rob) am from Georgia and Elisabeth is from Oklahoma. So how did we meet in North Carolina? I moved to North Carolina in 2014 for school. In 2019 I left to prepare and then go overseas to teach English for two years. Little did I know that a few months before I had left North Carolina, Elisabeth had moved there to begin a Master’s degree at the same school I had attended. But in those few months we never crossed paths. She completed her degree in December of 2022 and prepared herself to leave the following summer for a three year overseas work program. I returned to NC January 2023 for my own Master’s degree and rejoined the church I had been a member of. Elisabeth had joined that same church. My first Sunday back at my old church, I was talking to a couple I had known from before I left who ran the church’s ESL ministry. While talking to them they introduced me to a woman in their small group who also helped them with ESL. That Sunday, I admit to my shame I took little notice, so focused I was on reconnecting with old friends. But this couple invited me to rejoin the ESL ministry at the church and to visit their small group. And that’s where the story really begins… Elisabeth's Perspective: The year was 2023, and I was living in North Carolina, having just graduated with my master’s degree in December of the previous year. I was in the process of applying to go overseas to work in France for three years… a dream of mine for over a decade! I was set to leave in June to spend some time with family in Oklahoma for a bit until training in July. After my graduation, I decided to stay in the area for another six months because my community was there, and I had a job that allowed me to stick around. In early February while at church I met a guy who had been working overseas for the past couple of years and had come back to North Carolina to begin his master’s degree. The introduction was brief, but a few weeks later he showed up to the small group I was in and started serving in the ESL ministry at our church.

A few weeks later I (Rob) visited this couple’s small group. I knew one of the other couples in the group from my time at the church before, but the rest of the people were new to me, including the woman (Elisabeth) they had introduced me to at church a few weeks earlier. I remember little of what transpired during that small group. But afterwards a few people stayed around to talk. As I talked about an aspect of living overseas a form appeared at my side. It was like I had summoned her. She sat wide-eyed staring into my face from right next to me, not to hear stories of living overseas, but ready with her own informed opinion on issues and topics of international life. This is the moment I knew I needed to get to know Elisabeth better.

I (Rob) knew at this point that she was scheduled to leave that summer for 3 YEARS. But I quickly decided she was worth pursuing anyway. Over the next few months I took every opportunity to be around her and talk to her. I would talk to her at church (though our small group leaders made an effort to sit between us at church), after small group, any event at school she still came to, a random school event at a local Mosque that I call our unofficial first date, any church event, ESL at church. As I continued to get to know her, I only got more and more interested. However, I knew time was short and didn’t know how she felt. Then I noticed a shift. To set-up and tear-down for ESL every week at church, we had to load up a cart with our ESL things from an upstairs closet, and wheel it to the elevator, and then downstairs (one or twice running into the wall with the cart, which Elisabeth made fun of me for). This was my job. Buuuuuut I often found an excuse to ask her to help. At some point though, I stopped having to ask and SHE was going out of her way to be around early and then again after to help. It was also around this process of loading and unloading the ESL cart that we bonded over one of our favorite things…banter (see the above running into the wall comments). Elisabeth's Perspective: As I got to know him, I noticed a few things: we agreed on a lot of theological and political positions, he appreciated sarcasm, and he was big on clear communication. I also noticed that he had gorgeous eyes. At this time though, I was determined not to like him because I was about to move overseas for three years! But he was such an easy person to talk to, and I began looking forward to seeing him multiple times a week.

As the Spring continued, it became clear to me I (Rob) had to ask her out, and soon. It also became clear to me she was aware of my interest and I’d be insulting her intelligence not to say something to her. So one Thursday, after a church prayer meeting, as we were walking out together I *casually* asked if she wanted to grab some ice cream at a place down the street from the church. She said “yes” though that would be the only thing she said “yes” to that evening. We arrived at the ice cream place and I’m doing the mental calculations: “should I pay for her ice cream, it’s not an official date so I don’t want to scare her or tip off what’s happening, but then if I don’t, does that send a negative message?” I ended up not paying for ice cream (which ended up being the right move according to her). As we sat and talked I finally got to the point. “I know you’re about to leave to go overseas, but I think you are worth having this conversation with and you deserve to know, I find you endlessly fascinating and want to continue getting to know you, intentionally.” And so I asked her to be in a relationship. To which she replied: “No, but it’s a soft no.” Elisabeth's Perspective: As the months progressed I could tell he seemed to like me. I was torn, knowing that I had no plans to put my overseas job on hold. Then one day… it happened. After a prayer meeting at the church, he stopped me and asked me to ice cream. I had no reason to say no, so I agreed. The entire drive there I remember feeling an excited panic and saying “ohcrapohcrapohcrapohcrap” over and over again. I determined I would not let him pay, because this would not be a date! Once we arrived, there was a nervous energy, but we were still able to talk easily. Then the conversation shifted and he told me that he liked me and wanted to begin a relationship. I told him, “no… but a soft no,” and explained that I was going overseas and didn’t feel like I knew him well enough to commit to a relationship, but also I knew we were becoming good friends and that was a good foundation to see about moving forward.

Immediately following this we began to talk even more, text one another more, and even crossed the “Great Wall of Small Group Leaders” to sit next to each other at church. The “no” indeed appeared to me (Rob) very soft, and I kept hope (though with admitted worry and lots of prayer). A few weeks later our church hosted a lo-fi music night for which Elisabeth and I helped set up, flirting with each other the entire time. It was also at this event I was able to do the obligatory “guy shows off how many chairs he can carry at once at church to impress girl.” I think it worked. For once the event started, we sat in one of the paired sets of chairs paying intermittent attention to the music and more focused attention to one another, talking and spending a large amount of time doing what I call “staring into each other’s face smiling like idiots.” I left the event pretty sure the “no” would not stay one for long. Sometime around this same time, she showed up at the coffee shop she knew I was studying at one afternoon and sat with me for the afternoon, another sign the “no” would not last long. A few weeks later she recommended I apply for the job she would be leaving before leaving town, believing I would enjoy it. Two weeks later she was training me for the job. The two weeks of overlap at the job were interesting, awkward, tense, and wonderful. At times I was convinced she hated me, but by the end of the two weeks we had resumed occasionally just staring at each other’s faces. Then she asked me to take her to the airport, and I knew. Only God’s hand got us to the airport that day, for I spent more time again staring at her face and grinning like an idiot than I did paying attention to the road. We arrived at the airport and I helped her unload her bags and stood there awkwardly. Then she said, “we can hug.” So, for the first time, I hugged her. And then I really knew. Elisabeth's Perspective: And so over the rest of the spring we got to know each other more. We flirted a lot, and sometimes I wanted to hang out with him more, and other times I wanted to run away because I wasn’t sure if this was going to work out. But each time we hung out I enjoyed myself and was drawn to him like a magnet. I continued to go along as things evolved naturally to us becoming closer. One day, I asked him to take me to the airport because I was going to join up with my parents at the SBC Annual Meeting, and he did. After he dropped me off, I went in for a hug, and it was a solid 10/10 hug. I still remember the shirt he was wearing that day

She was gone for a week on the trip I dropped her off for. After she returned, she only had about 10 days left in North Carolina before she was gone for good. I probably confirmed about half a dozen times that we would have at least one more time to hang out before she left, wanting to hang out with her but also determined to give her a chance to change her ‘no.’ So we once again found ourselves on a Thursday after a church prayer meeting getting ice cream. This time at a different place, and this time I paid. We got our ice creams and sat next to each other on a bench and began to talk, with me fully intending to ask her to enter a relationship again. But she brought it up before I could. We both liked each other and we both wanted a relationship, but she was heading overseas for three years. But we were willing to try it anyway. We were convinced God had brought us both together and was leading her to go overseas for these three years. We decided we would walk forward together in faith in this daunting venture. We were excited. We were scared. We were sad. We were looking at a long, hard, and seemingly impossible three years. But not trying seemed an even worse option. So we trusted God and decided to walk forward together. And while we sat there on the bench, her head on my shoulder, processing what we were about to walk into and enjoying being with each other…our small group leaders and another couple from our church walked by and saw us. The couple’s young daughter kept coming over to us. This began a history of running into people we know when out on dates together. Elisabeth's Perspective: On my trip with my parents I timidly began to drop one or two random facts about Rob each day. We texted throughout the entire week that I was gone (about SBC going ons and politics :D), and then when I got back, we made plans to hang out before I left. A couple of evenings before I left, we went and got some custard and hung out. Eventually I told him that I do like him, I just don’t know what things look like moving forward with me going overseas. Now we count this as when we started dating, but I remember apologizing for not having any clarity on how to define what we were and he said, “That’s okay, what we are is weird.”

The next day, Friday, she texted me and asked if I was available Saturday to go to a movie. So we went to our first movie together and grabbed lunch. Enjoying spending as much time together as we could before she was leaving town early Monday morning. While eating lunch we once again ran into a couple from church we knew. On Sunday, I went over to her place to see her one more time before she left. We spent about an hour and a half talking and doing our best not to cry. But soon enough it was time. I did the hardest thing I may have ever done. I got in my car and drove away. Thankfully, I was the only person at the gas station I stopped at just down the road to fill up so no one had to wonder about the man weeping at the gas pump. The next day she left town and we began what’s been a three year pattern of daily texting, Marco Polos, and weekend FaceTimes.

When she left North Carolina, she went home to Oklahoma to spend some time with her family before going to a seven-week training course. After the training course she returned to Oklahoma for two weeks before heading overseas. In that two weeks we worked out a time for me to fly and visit her in Oklahoma for five or six days. On the visit I got to meet her parents (who took us to an amazing Oklahoma steak dinner) and we went to the Oklahoma State Fair (which is much better than the NC one, sorry). I even won her a bear at the fair. It was on this Oklahoma trip, sitting at a coffee shop, where I told her for the first time, “I love you.” I wanted her to hear it in person for the first time. And six weeks later, once she was sure she meant it, true to her character, she responded in kind. Elisabeth's Perspective: Fast forward a couple of months and he came to visit me in Oklahoma. During that time he told me “I love you.” I was not ready to say it yet, but I knew I would be eventually. After that week, he returned to North Carolina, and I went off to France! A couple of months later, in November, I told him “I love you” in return.

A year and a few weeks later I hopped on a plane to France to see her for the next time. It was a special ten-day visit. She showed me around her city, Lyon, and I got to meet many of her friends and visit her church. We also took two special day trips. The first to Avignon. We took a train down and spent the day exploring the town and the beautiful Papal palace (more a castle than a palace). Then a few days later we took a bus to Annecy, a beautiful city on a lake in the French alps. We had lunch at a fancy, French restaurant and spent time hanging out by the lake looking up at the snow-capped mountains. On this trip I made clear to her my desire and intention to marry her, once again wanting her to hear it from me in person and not over a phone.

Another year and few weeks later and this time she hopped on a plane to come to North Carolina to see me for my graduation from my Master’s degree. This was a special and sweet time. We were able to attend our church together for the first time in two and half years. I introduced her to playing disc golf (which thankfully she seemed to like). We had dinner almost every night with different friends of ours. She got to meet my parents for the first time as they also came up for my graduation. It was a sweet time getting to spend time once again, and really for the first time as a couple, in the town where we’d be starting our married life together. When we parted this time, we resolved to see each other much sooner than the last two times we’d said goodbye.

Four months later, April 2026, I once again hopped on a plane to visit her in France. This time with a ring in my pocket (that I had picked up on the way to the airport, but that’s another story.) I arrived on a Thursday morning, tired from overnight travel, so we spent the day at the house of some of her friends, to keep me awake until nightfall. The next day, Friday, we planned a day trip to an old medieval French town just outside her city. Going on the trip, I knew I was going to propose, the hard part was deciding when. Not living in that city, I couldn’t really come up with any plan, rather I had to eyeball a few moments in our schedule that seemed to be good times. One was a hike we would take one day, but we would be doing that with others, and I knew we both would prefer a more private moment for our engagement. Another option was to find a time we could get to a pretty spot in her city and propose there. I knew it would be special to her to get engaged in a city she loved and had spent so much time in, but I wasn’t sure how to do that in a pretty spot in the city without there being a crowd. The last option was in the medieval town on Friday. On Friday, I decided to do it then, I wanted to go ahead and propose early in the trip so we could enjoy the rest of the trip as an engaged couple (and I was tired of not being engaged to her). As we walked around the medieval town, I looked for a really pretty place, but though the town was pretty, there wasn’t a great location. She had mentioned the possibility of taking a gondola to the top of a nearby mountain in the Alps, but we ended up not having time. I was scrambling to think of how to get it done that day. She had the idea that we could drive back through some hills on the south side of the city, so I thought maybe there’d be a pretty place to pull off and propose on a hillside overlooking the city. But again, there wasn’t the chance. As we were heading back into town and the sun was starting to go down, I suddenly remembered. There is a point in the middle of the city where two rivers converge that create an isolated peninsula that is really pretty. I *casually* floated the idea of going down to that place before heading back for the evening, even suggesting we might even be there for a pretty sunset. As we got off the tram to walk down the convergence of the two rivers, I noticed she was glancing at my pockets. As we arrived, two guys were packing up some photography equipment, so I *casually* asked her if we could just hang around a few minutes. Once we had the spot to ourselves, right at the very point where the two rivers joined, I said “On the topic of two things joining and becoming one…” and I got down on my knee and asked her to marry me. And she said yes! The next few days were really special as we got to share with friends and family, both in the US via FaceTime and with the ones in person there in France. We were happy to be engaged, but getting to share in that happiness with others we love and see how happy they were for us was a really special time. Then I once again got on a plane to fly away from her, but for one of the last times. Soon we will be back together with each other for good.

During my time in France, Rob and I saw each other in person three times: November 2024 when he came to visit me, November/December 2025 when I went to visit him in North Carolina, and finally over Easter of 2026. We had a standing FaceTime date every weekend we could, and kept in constant communication. Rob impressed me, from the time we met until today, with his calm and steady presence. He helped me process things about living overseas, and was full of wisdom and good advice. When he visited in April of 2026, I knew that something was coming. I got one of my coworkers to go with me to get a manicure “for Easter”... but knowing it was probably for a proposal. The day after we arrived we went to a medieval town not far from where I live, and he tried hard to find a good place to go off by ourselves to propose. He told me “If you see a good place to go and take a picture together, let me know.” Alas, no such opportunity arose while we were in the medieval town, nor afterwards as we were driving through the surrounding hills (and he did state the desire to pull off somewhere to take a photo at least three times). Eventually it was time to head back to my city, and so he suggested that to finish our day we go to a park where the two rivers that run through the city meet together. I agreed, and we headed that way. By the time we arrived, it was sunset. He got down on one knee (after we waited a few suspicious minutes for a couple of people to leave) and asked me to marry him, and I said yes! We enjoyed telling our families that evening, and then the rest of our family and friends the next couple of days.

Coming up at the end of the summer, only three months apart this time, we will both be a part of a trip from our church to Africa, me coming from NC and her from France, even sharing a leg of our flight together. Shortly after she’ll return home from her time overseas to spend some time with her family in OK. In September, I’ll meet her in OK to meet some of her extended family and then help move her back to NC where we will be reunited for good. Then in November we will get married, at the church where we met and continue in membership.