Matron of Honor
No, she's not Jonah’s biological sister.
Best Man
Tall, black, 23-year-old male with bad knees.
Bridesmaid
Wants to marry Michael B. Jordan but ended up with a Korean
Groomsman
Short, Filipino, 33-year-old male.
Bridesmaid
16 year old female with nice teeth.
Groomsman
Bob Marley
Bridesmaid
20-year-old female who likes to yeehaw.
Groomsman
Tall, 20-something-year-old male with sick beats.
Bridesmaid
Looks white, actually Mexican.
Groomsman
White boy with the hops.
Bridesmaid
Can’t bring her anywhere, she’s too loud.
Groomsman
Married a cougar.
Bridesmaid
"If you had the chance to change your fate, would ya?"
Groomsman
The groom’s barber.