Welcome Brave Souls - Julie's Getting Colleyed and Mike Has No Escape!

After resigning herself to the destiny of a future Crazy Cat Lady of the Realm, the maiden at last surrendered to the relentless counsel of her peers and ventured into the treacherous lands of Facebook Dating. Two days passed—two long days filled with strange suitors, cursed conversations, and enough emotional scarring to fill a bard’s lament—when at last she stumbled upon a man who seemed… normal. A rare creature indeed. Sensing the gods had played enough tricks for one lifetime, she promptly fled the battlefield, declaring her quest for love officially over. Yet, in a moment of casual bravado, she tossed the warrior her number with a breezy, “Shouldst thou wish to speak further.” Spoiler from the court: He did indeed wish to speak. And—though the man was famously proud of his, ahem, sword—not once did he send an unsolicited portrait of it. A miracle worthy of song. After a month of lively scroll‑writing and one rescheduled meeting (for lo, the maiden admits she was the problem), the two finally met at the local Starbucks Tavern. And there, amidst the aroma of mediocre brew, something unexpected happened. Their conversation flowed effortlessly—light, warm, and disarmingly natural. She adored his humor, his smile, and the way his eyes smiled too. The coffee was merely “acceptable,” but the company—and the view, rawrrrr—was exceptional. When he rose to visit the privy, she watched him walk away with great appreciation, whispering to herself, “A fine specimen indeed.” At parting, she bestowed upon him the world’s most awkward cheek‑peck, then marched away muttering, “Julie, thou hast no game. Prepare thyself for ghosting. Remember: thou needest no man. Thou art a strong, independent woman who shall ENJOY HER CATS.” But destiny, ever the trickster, had other plans. And now, the rest is legend. For she has found not only a partner in life, but someone with whom she may proudly share the cat hair.

Picture a man, alone and fighting tooth and nail against onslaught of internet dates and women throwing themselves endlessly at him. This man, this brave warrior of a man, along with his big stick, beat them back one by one for years on end. Just when this man was at the end of his strength and will to persevere, he saw it - a little red notification dot on his Facebook dating profile. He mustered up the last of his remaining strength and courage to open the app and gaze upon the request. To his surprise, what did he see? He saw a radiant face in a unicorn onesie and said aloud, "please don't be a furry." Thankfully, a furry she was not. So the conversation quest to get to know this fair maiden began and blossomed into an eventual coffee date after a slight delay due to c blocking children. The conversation....divine. The coffee...meh and the cheek kiss...awkward, but the day, oh the day, was victorious. It was from then on that the mighty warrior had no need of that big stick or those apps that had tortured him so. As a matter of fact, he now only needed one stick (wink wink). The journey of this warrior and his maiden has been full of epic adventures and the trials of love, lust and everything that comes with a journey so grand. This beautiful journey has only just begun and the best is certainly yet to come. Join Mike the Warrior and Julie the Maiden on this journey and be part of an epic tail the likes of which legends are made.