this is the story of jiwon and justin - from both perspectives:

justin: i decided to go to my first New Song Church retreat, which i ended up being in the same small group as jiwon. my first impression from seeing a masked face (as we were coming out of COVID): “she didn’t show up to half of the retreat - does she even want to be here? also, she looks kind of fierce. but she has nice eyes.” for context, i was in a season where i had no interest in dating, and wanted to focus on myself & my relationship with God, so i was extra alert in making sure i keep the girls away from me. after talking and hanging out in groups at the retreat for a bit, i noticed her fierce eye contact during conversations. this triggered my body defense system, which resulted in me staying away from her for the rest of the camp to make sure there is no chance for any feelings or love interests between me or anyone. (you would understand if you felt the presence of her eye contact) jiwon: i also last minute decided to go to our church retreat but could only attend for basically half a day. i arrived saturday for the morning session and was placed into a small group with justin. i’d gotten pretty familiar with the people at New Song but had never seen justin before, and my first impression of him was that he was some kid that didn’t wanna be here LOL. but then he shared during small group and so i thought ok maybe he does wanna be here. (i found out way later that this man had the audacity to think that i could possibly become interested in him because i made eye contact…i was literally just listening to him share in small group)

justin: the first co-ed small group (and the last since the writing of this timeline). since i had been going to New Song Church for only 1 month, I was a bit hesitant and worried before hearing about who was in my small group since i was new… which ended up being with a group of people where i didn’t know a single person, plus jiwon: the fierce-eyed & “didn’t want to be there”. this is going to be great..! jiwon: yeah no one really knew each other that well at the beginning of this small group so it was gonna be an interesting time. shoutout jinions ♡

justin: throughout the next few months, jiwon and i grew to have a platonic friendship. we hung out in groups, worked remotely a couple times, and had great conversations. i learned that she wasn’t that scary, and we actually had similar ways of thinking and i saw her heart to seek to understand people and listen to others. i enjoyed hanging out with her, whether it was losing in bowling (and i was trying) or hanging out with our small group (shoutout to the JINIONS!!). at the end of june, something randomly shifted. i remember after our church’s worship & prayer night, i said only one thing to her: “hey, you’re twinning with that girl over there” and i walked away, left church, and drove back home in my car, thinking to myself: “why the heck did i say that?” i soon realized i was thinking A LOT about this interaction, and came to a conclusion that i needed to reflect on whether i had feelings for her and why out of nowhere. so i’ll take some time to think here… but let me try and get to know her more personally, so i’ll try and start a facebook messenger conversation. kinda like the one where you think a lot about whether you should send it or not, but when you do, you throw your phone into a pillow, contemplating if you just embarrassed yourself by asking “what does one do if they go to joshua tree??” (for context, i left on a family vacation to palm springs, CA, the day after the interaction, and thought it was a good idea to start a conversation this way. it worked though!!) jiwon: through small group and other settings, i got to know justin and see more of his character. i noticed his willingness to serve and natural ability to champion the people around him. sometime in june i was contemplating whether or not i was interested in this guy. we got along well and i felt comfortable with him, but it also just felt very normal. so i tried to convince myself into thinking that maybe i don’t like him HAHA. then i get a random message about joshua tree and we start talking.

justin: at this point, since the interaction, i could point to some things i truly liked about her as a person: her straight-forward responses (when she says something, she means it), her heart to understand people and not quick to judge, and she had beautiful eyes. these are just a few to name out of many, but i needed some time to get to know her personally and not throw her off with this sudden shift of feelings. the following weekend, i lost in bowling (and i genuinely tried. she is GOOD) in which the losing team would owe the winning team dessert that needed to be redeemed. i asked her on sunday after church, if she wanted to redeem her dessert this upcoming week and we could work remotely. she said yes, and it was a very chill conversation – and another opportunity where i could talk to her one-on-one to get to know her. so the day i didn’t know was coming comes – we remotely work at a wework in bellevue, then got dessert, and we had great conversation throughout the day. after the day seemed to be over, for some reason, jiwon wasn’t closing our conversation when i gave a clear opportunity to end and head home after the dessert. i could tell she was lingering in her seat, as if she was hesitating to go. noticing with my elite senses (my 눈치), i asked if she wanted to go on a walk in a nearby neighborhood to digest our dessert and she agreed. as we were walking, she asked me “how do you think your sense/nunchi (눈치) is?” right when she asked this, i knew what was coming… so clearly i responded that i thought it was okay. and then she asked “how is your sense/nunchi (눈치) with me?” two thoughts going in my mind at this moment: one: “is this really happening right now? is she confessing to me?” this is a guys’ dream come true (not particularly, but makes it easier for us right? give me a bit more time, and i would have initiated this conversation, but dang that was smooth i guess) two: “i’ve only thought about my feelings and where i’m at for like 1-2 weeks, am i really ready to have this conversation right now?” did i mention she was going to be in new york & san francisco for the next couple months? well yes, i found that out too. we then talked for the next few hours, walking around and sitting at a nearby park, sharing about why we feel this way, and decided to talk with our pastor about how we can go towards being in a relationship in a God glorifying way. jiwon: we had set a day to work together and redeem the dessert. leading up to this point, i became more certain of my interest in justin but i wasn’t completely sure if it was mutual. i was also about to leave washington for 2 months, and i didn’t want to be in a state of ambiguity if we weren’t physically in the same space. through processing with friends, i decided to bring it up in conversation (which i have never ever done before). by the time we finish working and getting dessert, i still hadn’t brought it up. i’m second guessing if i should even say anything until justin suggests we go for a walk around this random neighborhood. (if you read justin’s part you know how the convo went) so yes basically i confess and i was banking on 1 of 2 outcomes: 1: it’s mutual, which is great and we go from there. or 2: it’s not mutual, which is fine but then i can run away for 2 months and not think about it LOL fortunately it ended up being option 1, and so we spend the next few hours talking about the best way to move forward.

justin: after months of intentionally talking, wrestling with our feelings, and a lot of prayer… i came to a point where i realized that i want to pursue her and commit to loving her in a formal relationship. so i texted her, if she would be down to meet and talk about US. she said yes, that she was free on november 15th. jiwon: for months we were going through our own seasons while juggling feelings and trying to figure out these next steps together. and then, justin asks to meet up.

justin: in seattle at golden gardens, we walked onto the docks and sat on a bench near the ledge of the boardwalk. the wind was blowing hard, and the sun was setting, and at that moment, i shared with her that after much thought and prayer, that i want to start this journey and commit to her as her boyfriend. at that moment, she said yes!! then, we walked back to the car as we were freezing our butts off – and that was the start of our relationship. the rest was history :) jiwon: i said yes and now here we are!!