It is 7:45 a.m. on Tuesday morning in the fall of 2017. I am sitting at my desk waiting for my freshman seminar to start, when this dude (whom everyone knows as the "guy who doesn't wear shoes") comes in and sits down beside me. I recalled having met him before, but to be honest, I couldn’t remember our conversation and barely his name (ah, it’s Jacob). Jacob sweetly says hello and commences to tell me about the hurricanes in Florida and how his roommate smashed his toe in a door. I listened politely. After a moment of silence, Jacob asked me if I would like to get coffee with him sometime. Well, I wasn’t sure how to say no, so I said yes (I don’t recommend this tactic usually, but the Lord is sovereign and here we are engaged). For the next twelve hours, I was miserable. Why did I have to say yes? I knew there was no way I would start dating five weeks into my first semester of college. Now I will have to go on this date, end up telling him I don’t want to date, and then his heart will break, and then he’ll become depressed and my reputation will go down the toilet. How could I have made this mistake? That night, I called my mom, who assured me that everything will be fine and we’ll both move on eventually. Not so, Mom. The next day, we met around noon at Peet's Coffee. Jacob had dressed up a bit (I was in a bad mood, so I didn't) and couldn’t decide whether to be giddy or nervous. For an hour we drank coffee, talked about all sorts of things, and had a swell time…and I had to admit that smile of his was the cutest thing ever. After the date, Jacob asked if I would consider another one. I had to be honest and explain that it wasn’t the right time (but I was still determined nothing would come of this). Jacob was disappointed, but he was also determined. For the next few weeks, he began sitting next to me in every class, seizing every opportunity to talk and get to know me. I knew what he was doing, but as time went on, he started growing on me...

As the semester continued, Ruby and I spent more and more time together. After our first orchestra concert, I took her to an event thrown by a campus ministry I was a part of, and yet again asked her on a second date, only to meet rejection. Ruby gave the excuse that she didn't want to date in her freshman year of college, and I was left to wrestle with my thoughts. "Is it really worth it to continue pursuing her?" I wondered. I began to pray fervently, asking the Lord for wisdom. After praying for weeks, God put it on my heart that I would marry Ruby one day. I couldn't quite fathom how that was possible, as a freshman who couldn't even get a second date, but with God all things are possible. I continued to pray for guidance, and God was knitting our hearts together. The end of the semester approached rapidly, and while my feelings for Ruby were still growing, I had a sense of peace and patience in waiting on God's timing. On one cold evening in December, Ruby and I crossed campus together to attend another campus ministry, arriving early as usual to read Scripture and talk. As I was locking up my bike, Ruby told me that she had really been enjoying our time together, and that her heart had changed in many ways. Not wanting to be too presumptuous, I simply agreed that I enjoyed our time together too. We walked up to our usual reading spot, and my brain began to process what Ruby said. Still nervous about misinterpreting her comment, I mustered up the courage to ask her on a second date again, to which she said yes (on purpose, this time)! For our second date, Ruby and I shared a mediocre meal at the campus dining hall before making the journey to uptown to see the Charlotte Symphony's Magic of Christmas. Having become best friends through the semester, we had a wonderful time together. On the drive home, I asked Ruby to be my girlfriend, and our relationship became official.

Christmas break rolled around, and Jacob finally met most of the family, which was slightly overwhelming at first (Jacob hadn’t been there for ten minutes before he found himself digging a hole in the middle of the woods with my siblings). The spring and summer of 2018 were full of exploration for us. Not only did we discover the beauties of North Carolina together on our visits, but we also had the privilege of observing the beautiful and faulty aspects of one another. For a few weeks during the summer, we discussed our future. We knew we strongly desired marriage, but it simply wasn’t doable any time soon, so we committed to praying about it and trusted that in time, the Lord would make our path straight. The fall semester came along and we continued to grow deeper in the Lord and in our relationship. The semester was terribly difficult with school, hard talks, and my dad's diagnosis of cancer (which he is now free from!), but Jesus was with us and did incredible things in our lives. The next spring brought more challenges with it. Jacob lost his job due to the place shutting down, which put him in a long period of unemployment. But in all the uncertainty, the Lord was sovereign and gracious as He continued to sustain Jacob and later provided a job at the finest restaurant in Charlotte. Soon after that, Jacob began having health issues. He endured a month of severe gastrointestinal symptoms, without knowing what was going on ( he was later diagnosed with ulcerative colitis). It was during this season when the Lord knit Jacob and me together in new ways, as Jacob learned how to remain strong and confident for me, while I learned how to lay down my own needs and support him in joy and patience. Ultimately, this season gave us insight into what a godly marriage will be like—full of difficult challenges that by God’s grace, will grow our love and spiritual bond with each other and with Christ. At this point, we knew God was preparing us for a life together.

While we were unsure as to the timing of our marriage for a long time, Ruby and I were sure that that was where the Lord was leading us. As we prayed for guidance and began doing research on the practicality of getting married in school, all signs seemed to point towards a wedding in December of 2019. I sought the advice of other men in my church, created a rough budget, and prayed often. Finally, I mustered up the courage to speak with Ruby's father to ask for his blessing. To my relief, there was no hesitation in the giving of his blessing, and we had a wonderful conversation about the future! Now, I just had to propose... I had a perfect plan in mind, and was going to propose with my grandmother's diamond in a spot at UNC Charlotte that meant a lot to Ruby and me. I contacted my mom to have the gem mailed from Florida, and made arrangements with Ruby's sister to get us together on campus on June 2. The end of May came around, however, and the diamond still hadn't arrived. I prayed for guidance, and tried to convince myself that it would be just fine to propose without a ring, but on June 1, I felt a need to find something to propose with. I went from store to store, making numerous calls and stops, yet found nothing that looked appealing or would fit on Ruby's ring finger. Just as I was about to give up, I made one last stop at a local jeweler. I was drawn to their blue topaz rings, with the gem symbolizing us becoming one flesh with a December birth stone. The jeweler searched the back room for quite some time, finally reappearing with a beautiful ring in Ruby's size, and I knew I had to buy it. Finally, June 2 came around. Ruby and I went to church followed by a long, hot walk, while I carried a bulky ring box in my pocket. We met with her sister Julia and her husband at UNCC and took lots of pictures, then came back to our favorite lake where I got on my knee and asked Ruby to marry me.

Jacob and I are getting married on December 21st in my little home church in Morganton, North Carolina. It may be a little cramped, but we are so excited to have our loved ones celebrate with us and then send us off as man and wife! After a five-day honeymoon in Asheville, we will begin the second semester of our junior year at UNC Charlotte. We can't wait to continue our journey together and embark on new adventures that the Lord has in store for us in these years to come.