Carla & Alexander
Wedding Party
Maria Serani
Maid of Honor
Bride’s weird little sister. She loves her daughter Luna (husky) so much you may have noticed Luna has her own instagram or have seen them both bar hopping in Nyack. She comes with several warnings such as do not get her angry and do not feed her any green starbucks drinks. No one besides close family should have to find out what happens when she gets angry or has a green drink. Other than that, her weirdness matches any group of people she hangs out with. She is also very caring, supporting and if you’re ever in need someone, she'll always take care of you.
Paula Beltran
Bridesmaid
Bride's older sister. Studying psychology. Her favorite foods are chicken, hot dogs and any leftovers in the fridge. If anyone has any left over chicken nuggets or wings, please give her a call, she's more than interested. She also knows NYC better than anyone the bride knows and has an incredible talent with photoshop. She can take years off a photo better than any plastic surgeon in town. She's got an incredible taste in fashion but never ask her for make up advice. Overall, she is extremely resourceful and finds a way to do the things she sets her mind on.
Courtney Grossman
Bridesmaid
The youngest of the Grossman sons. What makes her stand out from her brothers is the fact that she sleeps with a heater in her room as opposed to the usual Grossman fan at the bedside. Her main interests are having fun and hanging out her pets. She loves her cats (Abbey and Olive) as well as her dog (Denard) so much that she uses a special type of voice to communicate with them. She is also going to school to be a teacher and help shape the young minds of the future.
Alyssa Grossman
Bridesmaid
Originally from Long Island but you can't tell by her accent especially when she says “O my Gawd”. She’s very athletic and was able to demolish the Groom in tennis without even breaking a sweat. She's a great elementary school teacher and cares for all her students. If you need something done, she’ll always ask her husband Matt to do it.
Justyna Soltys
Bridesmaid
Met the bride 8 years ago while working for Rockland bakery. Bride loved seeing her yell at people much taller than her but anyone reading this is probably taller than her. Don’t be fooled, when she gets angry, her height severely increases. Justyna is incredibly creative with a great eye for art. She is very thoughtful and always sends out cards through the mail to make sure you know she's thinking of you. Lastly, her father has one of the best mustaches the groom has ever seen. It will always be a goal of the groom to achieve a mustache of that caliber.
Maggie Andresen
Bridesmaid
Bride’s childhood friend since the 3rd grade. Growing up Maggie has always been tall, in fact she got confused for a substitute teacher in elementary school. Eventually we all went through puberty and kinda caught up to her height. Currently, Maggie is an incredible photojournalist and gets the chance to travel all over the world. Maggie also has an incredible attraction to objects in her walking path so please don't be alarmed if she stumbles or walks into a table.
Meaghan Ferraro
Bridesmaid
"Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee". Meg is a devoted fan of Will Ferrel, has an impartial disposition to dogs and her love for cats has increased upon the arrival of Boo. The poor kid had to share a womb with one of the groomsmen but that didn't stop her from becoming an educator and helping shape the minds of tomorrow. She still has a ways to go perfecting Peggy's Marsala, but she's on the right track.
Christy Schuetz
Bridesmaid
Christy is a very genuine friend, always coordinates the couples retreats, and is a marketing wiz. I would advise never to give her an inside pitch in whiffle ball/softball because she will turn on it for a homer but always comes up short in flip cup. No matter the temperature in the winter, you will find her at Lambeau Field rooting on the Packers.
Matt Grossman
Best Man
Grooms older brother. Very talented drummer with a great sense of humor. Has been a Kiss army member since 2005. Father of two unbelievable boys, and Can eat more McDonalds in a single sitting than anyone else in this room. He always looks out for the groom except of course during recreational sports, where he has a Drago mentality and will try to win at all costs. One summer he dyed his hair gold, and is the best older brother a guy could ask for. Also would like to mention runner up in the 2019 Alex Classic softball game.
Oscar Paez
Groomsman
Brother of the Bride. Another recreation junkie who is a Boston Redsox faithful.Disturbing I know. Highly competitive, excellent gamer, still a Red Sox fan, sickening, yes. An investigation is currently underway on whether his onion allergy is legitimate. We’ll keep you posted. Throughout the years, he has been like a father figure to bride. Teaching her almost everything she knows and fully shaping her competitive spirit but will always denies a loss to anyone, especially the bride. Please buy him a shot of rum, it's his favorite.
Mike Ferraro
Groomsman
Grooms volatile friend, knocked his own tooth out during an unfortunate pogostick accident, not 100 percent on his job title even though it has been explained numerous times, feel free to ask him yourself knowing it would be the biggest mistake of your life. Has consumed over 80 pieces of sushi and sashimi in a single sitting (not exaggerating, that is a real number) Full of life, full of vigor, full of shit. Very reliable, very genuine friend, tells you like it is, would pick you up at the airport at 2am, and then ridicule you on why you need to be picked up at the airport at 2 am.
Phil Diffley
Groomsman
Irish as they come, great friend of the groom, good impressionist, everyone, ask him to do his best impression, he'll love that. Once was responsible for the groom chipping his tooth, good athlete, great backyard football safety yet is a klutz, many memorable occasions at his house between the friends, claims he can eat more doughnuts than the groom, not a chance.
John Borean
Groomsman
Great friend of the groom, excellent golfer, were talking under par here people, once bought a 200 dollar tennis racket on an obsession, similar golf rage to Michael, very funny, recently tried to auction off a tray of his mother's chicken cutlets. Has made the groom laugh the hardest he ever has on two separate occasions, he knows them both.
Michael Oehrlein
Groomsman
Grooms younger brother from another mother. Has watched an entire season of Game of Thrones on a school night. Extremely smart, patient, loyal, has tremendous rage while golfing, and surprisingly burns easily. Outlandish fantasy football trade proposer, great sense of humor and is off to bigger and brighter things going off to college. Has won a fortnite solo match on multiple occasions, not an easy feat to accomplish.
Richie Bunyan
Groomsman
Tied with Mike as grooms oldest friend of the group, similar utensil usage to a primate, a real famous Amos ass, excellent ping pong player, excellent athlete in general, very smart, once witnessed groom and best man deathly afraid of horse flies on his father's boat, very disturbing. Gave the groom first taste of Johny Walker Blue and was a member of the New City Little League Juniors Mets, like the groom and best man
Nick Tzavis
Groomsman
Grooms dear friend, was once sighted wearing maroon corterious, has tremendous whit, good sense of humor, 2014 Goya softball player of the year, first to know the groom would want to marry the bride to be, makes his own olive oil, and has more miles than everyone in this room combined. Pretty sure he still has the first nickel he has ever earned and strangely enough sprays windex on every bodily affliction.
Rob Kelly
Groomsman
Grooms future brother-in law. He was trapped in a well for 4 days and smokes his own butterfish. Excellent wiffle ball pitcher, owns a Martin's potato roll tuxedo, very punctual, strong silent type, like Gary Cooper, and has been the same size since the age of 7. Can quote every line from all the greats, has a good sense of humor and looks exactly like our next door neighbor.
Luke Haas
Groomsman
Haas translates in German to an old old wooden ship used during the civil war era. Haas is a sound engineer with a good ear and is a genuinely good dude. He had the grooms bowling ball and bowling shoes in his car for multiple weeks along with an aero bed for multiple months and made multiple efforts to coordinate a drop off and for that, I commend him.