Jewish Wedding FAQs

Question

How did Gil and Talia meet?

Answer

Gil and Talia met at the wedding of mutual friends, Sarah and Will Baird, in July 2024. The following week, Gil and Talia went on their first date in Philadelphia, where Talia was living at the time. (Technically they met once in Washington, D.C. after a defense policy seminar, but that story is too dorky to tell their kids.)

Question

When is the wedding?

Answer

The wedding will begin at 4:00 PM sharp. Please arrive promptly so as not to miss the important pre-ceremony events of an Orthodox Jewish wedding.

Question

What are the two separate receptions for the bride and groom?

Answer

Beginning at 4:00 PM, Gil and Talia will host separate receptions (which are more like pre-ceremonies) as guests arrive at the wedding. Men will mostly gravitate towards Gil's "Chosson's Tisch" and women will gravitate towards Talia's "Kabbalat Panim." Food and drinks will be served at both receptions. During Talia's reception, she will sit on an elevated chair, and guests will come up to greet her. Kerri (Talia's mom) and Saradee (Gil's mom) will sit on either side of her, and Talia's bridesmaids will stand behind her. Gil's Tisch entails lots of singing and Scotch, and a few Jewish legal documents are read and signed. Afterwards, Kerri and Saradee break a wrapped plate, which symbolizes the finality of the bride and groom's marriage. After more singing and dancing, the men will accompany Gil as he leaves his reception and dance towards Talia for the Bedeken ceremony.

Question

What is the Bedeken?

Answer

Around 4:50 PM, Gil's friends will sing and dance him from the Tisch to Talia's reception for the Bedeken. "Bedeken" means "to check" in Yiddish. Gil will step forward and place the veil over Talia's face. This is an exciting and dramatic moment, and guests will be singing and cheering. (The songs are easy and catchy -- we promise!) After Gil places Talia's veil, their parents have the opportunity to offer quiet blessings to the bride and groom. The wedding party then leaves to get ready to walk down the aisle, and the guests are seated for the Chuppah ceremony.

Question

What happens during the ceremony?

Answer

The wedding ceremony is colloquially referred to as "The Chuppah." Gil, his family, and groomsmen will walk down the aisle first, and Gil will don a white robe called a Kitel. Talia's family and bridesmaids will walk down the aisle, and Talia will then join Gil under the ceremonial canopy (chuppah). The four corners of the chuppah represents the new home the couple will build together. Once under the canopy, Talia will walk around Gil seven times. These seven circles reflect the seven days of creation, symbolizing the couple’s creation of their new shared life. The number seven holds a significant place in Judaism and will echo throughout the wedding. The betrothal begins with a blessing over wine. Following the blessing, Gil places a ring on Talia's index finger and recites in Hebrew: “Behold, by this ring you are consecrated to me as my wife according to the laws of Moses and Israel.” Following the betrothal, the Jewish marriage contract (ketubah) is read. It outlines Gil's responsibilities to Talia as her husband. Next, the Seven Blessings (Sheva Brachot) are recited. They are adopted from Jewish texts and teachings, beginning with the blessing over the wine. It is customary to honor friends and family with the recitation of these blessings. The honorees approach and stand beneath the chuppah, where they hold the cup of wine and recite the blessing.

Question

How does the ceremony conclude?

Answer

At the conclusion of the ceremony, a sorrowful song will play as a cup wrapped in a cloth napkin is placed beneath the foot of the groom. Gil will stomp on and shatter the glass during the song. The shattering of the glass reminds us that even at the height of personal joy, we must recall the destruction of both Jewish temples in Jerusalem and subsequent exiling of the Jewish people from Israel. To maintain the sorrowful intent of this tradition, it is not recommended to shout "Mazal tov!" after Gil breaks the glass. Once the band begins to play joyful music, Gil and Talia are danced back down the aisle surrounded by their friends.

Question

What happens after the ceremony?

Answer

After the ceremony, Talia and Gil will enjoy a quiet moment in the Yichud Room, a designated place where Talia and Gil have a few moments alone for the first time as a married couple. Everyone else will proceed to the reception for the party!

Question

What is dancing like at a Jewish wedding?

Answer

The first "round" of dancing will be "simcha dancing," otherwise known as "the Hora," a traditional (and chaotic) Jewish circle dance to upbeat Hebrew music. For this dance, Gil and Talia will be welcomed into the reception as husband and wife for the first time. Gil and Talia will join their guests on the dance floor, and men and women will dance separately for the first half of the Hora. The circles will then combine. After the Hora, the rest of the night will mostly resemble any other wedding: lots of food, singing, dancing...and did we mention lots of food?

Question

What is a Mezinka?

Answer

When Jewish parents marry off all their children, an additional dance is performed to honor them, called a Mezinka. The Mezinka usually includes friends and family dancing around the parents with brooms. Gil is the fourth and final Fortgang to marry, so Saradee and Stanley will be honored with a Mezinka dance!

Question

How does the wedding end?

Answer

Around 10:00pm, guests will pull chairs around Gil and Talia's table to recite the Birkat HaMazon (grace after meals), and designated friends will repeat the Sheva Brachot.