Mike & Bre
Wedding Partayy
Melanie (Whiskey Sour) Plaza
Maid of Honor
Melanie is the MOH with the mostest. She is Bres best friend and older but smaller sister. She does however show her age with her taste in fine whiskey and knowledge of The Revolutionary War. Catch her playing the plastic sax or making her famous cookies in her broskis insta stories. Have a sour or 2 with her but hands off this super genius she is married with a larbranoodledoodle in Cali.
Stru (Johnny Boy) Struzzieri
Best Man
Twins. If not by their size, in their heart. Mike and Stru share a brain, they think the same, and agree on almost everything. They became great friends after getting sent to the deans office for making fun of Ms. Bugalove’s accent. They cut school together everyday after that and the rest is history. Stru is loving, charming and wonderful.
Hristina (Sharooo) Lapanova
Bridesmaid
We call her H, but if you can pronounce her name you’ll get brownie points. She is a yogi who listens to Soca music. (H taught Bre what Soca music was along with many other things) H is ambitious and the most genuine friend a girl can have. She is a great co-worker and gym buddy even tho Bre feels weak as hell whenever she goes with H. Her boyfriends name is Pablo Escobar, just saying.
Jason (Goat) Gierum
Best Man
Goat, not because he is the greatest of all time, but because he looks like one. He unknowingly met the groom in Forest Park pre school, and rekindled their bromance at 10yrs old through manhunt, baseball and football. As years went by they preferred personal karaoke parties, and hanging out with their mutual friend Bobby… from New Jersey. Any further questions about our best man can be answered by listening to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1NTjqaAKBo&has_verified=1.
Natalie Pruden
Bridesmaid
Natalie is Bres bestie from high school and beyond! Cor 414 represent! Bitches that get mugged together, stay together. Natalie is the chillest most sincere friend you can have. She is another one, stolen by the warmth of California, but Bre loves the excuse to escape NY. Natalie is the coolest person in our wedding party, meet her by the bar for a whiskey and honest conversation.
Sean McPhillips
Groomsman
Sean and Mike became instant friends over their taste in music and sense of humor. One of Mikes favorite places on earth was Seans garage, but sadly like Shea stadium and CBGB’s, they must only live in our hearts. Sean is truly his own person, and Mike loves that person. Bres favorite past times include jumping out of things to scare Sean and prank phone calling him. You’ll see him singing Ricky Martin on the rooftop karaoke party.
Oxy (Cotton) Sardano
Bridesmaid
Watch out, she bites! You’ll want this crazy Russian on your side when shit goes down. She is “literally” awwwesome. The energy of a 5 year old boy and the heart of a 5 month old labradore retriever, she’s definitely one of the funnest people to be around. When she’s not bartending she’s on the other side, and she will be August 24th!
Dondi (Wyatt) Malave
Groomsman
Mike loves his cousin. They work together, they drink together (whiskey not milk). They both love Bruce, Johnny Cash and Rudy’s. 2 milk men, Born to Run. Nothing feels better than blood on blood. Mike appreciates Dondi's outlook on life..."Nothing ever gets better, it only gets worse."
Cassandra (Cassie) Scharrer
Bridesmaid
Like most female bestie stories start, Bre and Cassie joined a bad blood squad slaying evil bitches. Jk, but they’d be down. This MILF is spunky, funny n friendly. Cass & Bre are bingo bitches and will be until they are an appropriate age to play bingo. She is now preggers so will remember the fool you are about to make of yourself on the dance floor.
Ryan Gilfedder
Groomsman
Ryan likes long walks on the beach and playing his guitar. Mike & Bre appreciate him for having good taste in all things that matter, (Music, Movies & Baseball) Bre played with Ryan in multiple bands and thinks he’s funner when drunk, but an overall good guy.
Kayla Caruso
Bridesmaid
The bombshell from BK. She likes cawfee, Sunday sauce and her father is Fabio. What more can I say? Kayla is fucking funny, a good listener and keeps it real. Watch her on the dance floor twerkin’, you can probably learn a thing or two.
(Mohawk) Dave L'Heureux
Groomsman
Dave is a 30-something year old punk rocker looking for the budlight of this life... wait wrong platform. Dave’s found Cassie and definitely has an extra budlight in the fridge if you were wondering. Anyway, Mike has known Dave since they were teenage punk rockers at Red Zone; and Bre has played in a band with him for over 8 years. (The Cuts ;) funny thing, he’s looked exactly the same that whole time!! He’s the one with the huge red mohawk. Make sure he breaks his record on the wedding night.
Vincent Motieram
Bridesman
Vincent is Bres gay boyfriend. He technically proposed first, during sophomore Bio. As Bre is writing this she realize she never actually called that engagement off...is dat bad? Vincent is a talented, fun loving, beautiful person. His magnetic energy wouldn't make him hard to find on the wedding day.
Tim (The Kid) Hamilton
Ring Bearer
Tim is Mikes long time friend, and Bre’s favorite person to impersonate. He loves the Mets and pretty much hates everything else. Catch the Atlantic City Italian vampire wandering the boardwalk at night, or listening to Rob Zombie. Tim was rated #1 funniest celebrity and usually charges for appearances. He’s probably the only ring bearer you’d be legally allowed to grab a bud with, so you should definitely do that.
Allie Cherevas
Flower Girl
This is mikes #1 cousin (sorry Dondi). Don’t be intimidated by this beautiful fashionista, she can hang like the best of us. Be sure to tag @thepetitepig, Allies insta with all your food porn pics this evening. She is the queens of puns, and the only flower girl you’ll ever be allowed to call hot.
Judd Rosenblatt
Officiant
Judd is our Jewish Priest. He likes cold-stone ice cream, walking his multi racial dog Merlin and Bre’s sister. You can always count on him to order late night food, if anyone has the munchies after the wedding. Strike up a conversation with him about living your best narrative or fine art, you wouldn’t be disappointed.