We're Getting Married!

Did you know that 86% of relationships where the woman made the first move lead to marriage? Well, thank God Jess took one for the team and swiped right, or we’d all have a lot more free time on our hands this September. That’s right! First Tinder and then Hinge did its thing, and against all odds (and better judgment), here we are, gearing up for the big day. If we rewind to 2021, raise your hand if you thought there would be wedding bells for these two? No one? Thought so. Dan and Jess didn’t think so either. But as fate (or sheer stubbornness) would have it, they kept coming back to each other. There are a few special events that deserve a heartfelt thank you for bringing these Dan & Jess together: LNER Train Strikes – If it weren’t for these, Jess would have never been desperate enough to ask Dan to drive to Leeds to rescue her from a drunken night out. The Neighbour’s Cat – This goes without saying Boot & Shoe Pub – A place where good decisions are rare, and bad decisions lead to spontaneous holiday bookings just days later. Kraków’s Inexplicably Cheap Alcohol – Nothing speeds up romantic realisation for Dan like a few too many rounds of Polish vodka. And from there, the rest is history. Now, like every great couple, Dan and Jess have mastered the art of classic relationship clichés. They argue over what to watch on Netflix but end up scrolling for an hour and watching nothing. Jess complains about waking up to watch F1 at 4 am on a Sunday, but somehow knows more about F1 gossip than Dan. She also insists Dan shouldn’t talk about buying any more cars, yet conveniently has a Ferrari F12 AutoTrader notification turned on, just in case one magically fits their price range. Meanwhile, Dan insists he doesn’t want to be domesticated, yet somehow spends his free time researching how to make the grass greener and how to improve his work life balance. And now, they get to spend forever doing all the little things that make them weirdly, perfectly them. So here’s to Dan and Jess, proof that sometimes, the algorithm and dating apps work.