Arianna: “Oh, it’s this dating app, called ‘Bumble’”? sheepishly telling anyone who asked. Dating apps have had more than their fair-share of interesting reputations, but 2020 times called for 2020 measures. I was finally out of college and not yet employed via career. This was gonna be my only chance for years to be able to take any more risks. For once, a fruitless encounter wouldn’t do anything except waste my free time, which in the lockdown era, was a blessing. I was sitting in the den with my mom, watching “Indian Matchmaking” on Netflix. Something about the show inspired me to give dating one more shot. A few weeks later is when I saw Zach’s profile. Just based off of the photos he chose and the jokes in his profile, I could tell that even if it didn’t work out, it looked like at least dating would have been a good time. I yap to myself a lot and quoted “50% ‘SEA’, 50% WEED”. from SpongeBob to myself and then a few days later is when I saw Zach’s profile with a SpongeBob quote on it “1% EVIL, 99% HOT GAS”. I had to swipe at that point.

I never understood the hands-over-the-mouth-crying thing. A wise Redditor once said: “Marriage should never be a surprise”, and after reading all the horror stories of disastrous proposals where the other person is frozen in disgusted shock, I couldn’t see how it would be any other way. I knew I was getting married and proposed to, it was just a matter of “how” and “when”! The ring was a team effort, I picked the jeweler, and he picked the ring. If someone is spending a lot of money on something for you, it should be something you really can enjoy looking at. It’s all about whipping out the childhood dream-binder with all the little magazine clippings of your dream dress and your dream ring immediately upon meeting your man. (hahaha). C’mon don’t make the poor guy GUESS! A couple months into the relationship, I showed Zach one of my favorite movies where the main character has a crush on her co-worker, who invited her out for dinner. He explains he couldn’t do what he does without her and hands her a little black box. She of course thinks it’s a ring and she opens it to this awful clay-necklace and gets friend-zoned. Zach was able to find that necklace and gift it to me. I loved it, but was a little confused as the entire gimmick was that it was set up like a proposal was going to happen when it doesn’t. It was given to me as any other gift and I said he really should have committed to the bit! We both agreed that any normal person would be too scared to do that to someone they just started dating. He didn’t know me that well yet. Fast forward to 2023, we know the ring has been ordered and we had a trip to Europe coming up! Anyone would hope to be able to propose on that European trip, but the ring had not yet arrived by that time. A couple weeks after the trip. It’s one of my days off (Thursday), which means I’m up during the day, I’m on the couch, and I’m relaxing! I see the delivery guy come. “Cool, a package”! (Between the two of us, receiving packages is pretty common). “Hm, guess Zach ordered something dorky again”. Zach opens the door, thanks the delivery driver and then bolts downstairs with the package. “ZACH WHATS THAt”? I shout across the house. “Airbrush parts”! He responded. “Yeah, he *would* sprint across the house for that”. I thought to myself. I genuinely didn’t know it was the ring yet, but jokingly still tried to pry it out of Zach: “well, where IS the ring then”? “Aren’t we expecting it”? Zach, thinking I knew good and well that the box had the ring in it, he blabbed : “Ok, that was your ring. Wanna see it”? Oh, way to spoil it! We ran downstairs to go look at the ring. Now that the rings arrival had been so obvious, I still didn’t know when and how (and technically’if’) he was gonna propose! Jokingly, I started to make guesses…”Well let’s see, I really think you should do the Spider-Man thing”! (We laugh at the way Spider-Man proposed to MJ in one of our favorite Spider-Man movies; mischievously saying ‘How’d THAT get in there’? when Peter had the ring in MJs champagne). I keep guessing and thought aloud: “oo, you know what I’D DO”? “I’d wanna redeem myself for the clay necklace, and I’d pretend I’m gonna propose again and give you the necklace again”! I just had to keep blabbing, huh. Zach spun the laptop that he was working on around to reveal that he had placed an order for pressed-towelette tablets. In the film I had showed him earlier, the main character not only thinks she’s getting a ring from her co-worker, but she also accidentally had eaten a pressed towelette tablet, thinking it was an exotic appetizer. At that point I knew I had blew it. I guessed my OWN proposal exactly!!! The cats…all the cats…having now been yoinked out of the bag, I just said “ok let just do the stupid knee thing now, I ruined it”. So he asked like anyone would on one knee, and I was on the couch! Of course I said yes! We have fun here!